PPV REVIEW: WCW Starrcade 1990 - Collision Course

December 16, 1990, 

Kiel Auditorium in St. Louis, Missouri

It's entirely fitting that Starrcade 1990 - Collision Course was the last Starrcade event to have an association with the National Wrestling Alliance and the first to feature the proper WCW branding that us fans would go on to know, love, and instantly recognise.

Why?

Simple:

In the early days, Starrcade was a place were old-school stars like Harley Race, Dusty Rhodes, The Minnesota Wrecking Crew, and, of course, Ric Flair, would all go to war with their opponents on cards steeped in NWA tradition and straight-up professional wrestling.

Tonight, as Sting looked set to defend the iconic World Heavyweight Championship against the goofy Black Scorpion, it was becoming more and more obvious that this was a company moving away from that tradition and old-school pro wrestling approach and towards the kind of ill-fated attempts at sports entertainment that would give the guys over at Wrestlecrap enough ammunition for years.

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Still, this wasn't yet the kind of show dominated by the likes of the Ding Dongs, Oz, and other awful gimmicks. The Black Scorpion aside, there was still a lot of straight-up wrestling to be enjoyed here.

Would that help make this a good show, or would Ole Anderson's voice overs, a goofy guy in a mask, and a storyline that its creators were clearly scrambling to find a decent ending for, all put a dampener on things?

Let's head to the Kiel Auditorium in St. Louis, Missouri to find out, shall we?

On a Colission Course

Tonight's show opened with one of WCW's usually naff opening videos, this one featuring some of tonight's stars featured in the shape of actual stars which floated through the cosmos before a bunch of rocks exploded because, you know, COLISSIONS and stuff. 

With that uninspired opening out of the way, our announcers Jim Ross and Paul E. Dangerously welcomed us to Starrcade and ran through some of tonight's matches before sending it on down to your writer's favorite ring announcer, Gary Michael Capetta. 

The Opening Ceremonies

For his first act of the evening, GMC introduced us to a man he called "The Greatest Promoter of All Time," Sam Muchnik. 

After waiting patiently in the corner with Missy Hyatt on his arm, Muchnik took center stage and began to speak with the microphone so far away from his face that it was hard to hear him properly.

From what we could hear, Muchnik put over professional wrestling as the greatest and oldest sport in the world, thanked Ted Turner, Jim Herd, and a bunch of WCW excutives, and finally welcomed us to the Kiel Auditorium.

This was followed by the playing of the national anthem and, finally, our opening contest. 

Beautiful Bobby Eaton vs. The Z-Man

This was Bobby Eaton's first PPV singles match, and what a match it was. 

He and The Z-Man gave a great performance from start to finish and the results were utterly enjoyable. 

No nonsense, no fancy gimmicks (apart from Beautiful Bobby weirdly being billed as from "The Dark Side"), just straight-up pro wrestling the way it was meant to be done. 

After a fantastic opener, Z-Man missed a top-rope dropkick, allowing Eaton to roll him up for the one, the two, and the three.

Your Winner: Beautiful Bobby Eaton 

Somewhere out in the arena, Tony Schiavone interviewed Dick The Bruiser. 

The ring veteran had originally been scheduled to officiate the finals of the upcoming tag team tournament but now he was going to referee the cage match between Sting and The Black Scorpion later on in the show.

With that in mind, The Bruiser, sounding like he'd smoked 100 packs of cigarettes a day for 100 years, told Schiavone that since he was undefeated in cage matches, he was the perfect man for the job. 

Alrighty then.

The Parade of Nations 

Up next, Garry Michael Capletta MC'd what he called "The Parade of Nations."

Basically, this was a group of attractive women who walked down the entrance way and back, each one carrying the flag for a different country involved in the upcoming Pat O'Conner Memorial International Tag Team Tournament.

After each of the flags had been displayed, Jim Ross and Paul E. Heyamn looked at the tournament brackets before our show finally got underway. 

Pat O'Conner Tag Team Tournament Round 1: 

(South Africa) Sgt. Krueger & Col. Deklerk vs. (USA) The Steiner Brothers (Rick & Scott Steiner)

If you recall, Ted 'Flyboy Rocco Rock' Petty was playing the role of Col. Deklerk with either Ray Apollo the man most likley to be Sgt. Krueger, though please leave me a comment if I'm wrong on that one. 

The two had earned their right to compete in this tournament by winning a sub-standard match against another "South African" team back at Clash of The Champions XIII, though this match was somehow even worse. 

It was, for all intents and purposes, the briefest of squash matches. 

The South African team (neither of which were actually South African) would try for a move, Rick and Scott Steiner countered it, and that was that for about three minutes until Scotty hit the Frankensteiner to put this mess behind us. 

Your Winners: The Steiner Brothers (advance to the next round)

Pat O'Conner Tag Team Tournament Round 1: 
(Team Great Britain) Gentleman Chris Adams & Norman Smiley vs. (Team Mexico) Konnan & Rey Misteric)

Here we had Konan teaming with Rey Jr's uncle, Rey Mysterio, though apparently WCW couldn't agree on what to call him.

GMC introduced him as "Rey Mysterio," all of the graphics had him listed as "Rey Misteric" and later, Jim Ross called him "Rey Mysterioso."

Whatever he was called, Rey Sr., Konnan, Norman Smiley and Chris Adams gave us another fun match which surpassed the last tag team match by a thousand miles. 

Moving at a fast pace with plenty of high-flying and technical offence, this was a very good effort that kept the fans (including this one) highly entertained from first to last. 

After an entertaining contest, the Mexican duo picked up the win to go on to face The Steiners later in the show.

Your Winners: Konnan & Rey Misteric/Mysterio/Mysterioso

Post match, Mysterio dove over the top rope, missing Chris Adams by a quarter mile and taking himself out. It was a silly move. 

A Word With Wallstreet

Out in the arena, Missy Hyatt interviewed Alexandra York and Michael Wallstreet, both of whom were confident that Wallstreet would beat his rival Terry Taylor in under eight minutes.

Why? Because Ms. York's computer had declared it so, of course. 

This wasn't the greatest promo segment in the world, but it served its purpose, and the whole computer gimmick was always fun.

Pat O'Conner Tag Team Tournament Round 1:
(Team New Zealand) The Royal Family (Rip Morgan and Jack Victory) vs. (Team Japan) The Great Muta & Mr. Saito 

This wasn't the best of the three tag team matches we'd seen so far, but it was still a decent effort with some good action. 

Of course, in order to fit a whole tournament on the show as well as other matches, all of these opening contests were kept quite short, but that was a good thing as it meant none of these matches dragged and were each pretty explosive in their own different ways. 

After a pretty good few minutes of action, The Great Muta drilled Jack Victory with a suplex to pick up the win for his team. 

Your Winners: The Great Muta & Mr. Saito 

Post-match, Paul E. interviewed Mr. Saito and his silent partner, The Great Muta. 

Saito insisted that he and Muta didn't care who they had to face in the tournament, they were the best team and would prove it tonight.

Pat O' Conner Tag Team Tournament Round 1: 
(Team Canada) Bull Johnson & Troy Montour vs. (Team U.S.S.R) vs. Victor Zangiev & Salmon Hasimikov 

I'll be honest with you, dear readers, I've never heard of a single one of these competitors and Googling around doesn't seem to turn up much beyond a few sparse Cage Match profiles. 

The crowd clearly weren't too familiar with these two teams either as the match played out to near silence despite it being a technically competent performance. 

The men from the Soviet Union were billed as accomplished amateur wrestlers and Olympic athletes and thus used their skills to keep Bull Johnson & Troy Montour suitably grounded until a big-time German suplex sent Team U.S.S.R into the next round.

Your Winners: Victor Zangiev & Salmon Hasimikov

Following the bell, the Canadians constantly tried to get at their opponents, only for the referee to hold them back. 

Sting is Ready

Out in the back, Tony Schiavone interviewed Sting.

Cool, calm, and collected, the World Heavyweight Champion insisted that he was more than ready to take on The Black Scorpion and reveal his rival's identity once and for all.

A far cry from the Stinger's usual hyped-up, SHOUT-REALLY-EXCITEDLY promo style, this was good stuff that showed the champ was taking things seriously and lent a molecule of credibility to what had otherwise been a ridiculous storyline.

This was then followed by a look back at a confrontation between Terry Taylor and the duo of Michael Wallstreet and Alexandra York which had taken place on WCW Saturday Night, leading us to our next match.

Terry Taylor vs. Michael Wallstreet (w/ Alexandra York) 

Given Wallstreet and York's insistence that Taylor could be beaten in 8 minutes, a countdown clock displayed in the bottom-right hand corner of the screen for the entirety of the match.

Fortunately, it didn't distract too much from what was a solid yet unspectacular match.

The former Red Rooster came out swinging from the opening bell, battering his arch-nemesis with gusto before Wallstreet took control and maintained it for the majority of the match.

After a decent outing, the one-time Varsity Club member hit the Wallstreet Crash to win the match with 1 minute, 42 seconds to spare.

Your Winner: Michael Wallstreet

The match was followed by a commercial for the upcoming Wrestlewar 1991 PPV coming up in February. The show was set to feature a War Games match and, I have to be honest, I'm looking forward to watching it. 

The Motor City Mad Man & Big Cat vs. Sid Vicious & Dan Spivey

You know what a show featuring a seven-match tag team tournament needs? more tag team matches! 

More importantly, this was the first time we'd seen Sid Vicious & Dan Spivey teaming as The Skyscrapers on PPV since Halloween Havoc 1989, although Jim Ross informed us that Sid was still a member of the Four Horsemen. 

Interestingly, I didn't even have time to type that sentence before the whole the whole match was over.

Sid and Big Dan pummelled their opponents and destroyed The Motor City Madman with a spiked powerbomb in barely sixty seconds.

The crowd were hot for The Skyscrapers, but this was really nothing. 

Your Winners: The Skyscrapers 

After the match, Dangerously tried to interview The Skyscrapers, telling the crowd that this was a one-night only reunion. To correct him, Sid and Spivey lifted the announcer up and intimitated him by insisting that they would decide whether or not it was a one-night only thing.

Ricky Morton & 'Wildfire' Tommy Rich (w/ Robert Gibson) vs. The Fabulous Freebirds (Michael 'P.S' Hayes & Jimmy 'Jam' Garvin w/ Little Richard Marley)   

You know, by the time this match ended, we were only one hour and twenty minutes into the show and we'd already seen eight matches. Apparently, there are 14 on this card, so it looks like we're going to be here a while. 

That little grumble aside, this whole feud had come about when The Fabulous Freebirds had taken credit for destroying Robert Gibson's leg, forcing his partner Ricky Morton to tag with 'Wildfire' Tommy Rich in the meantime. 

Gibson accompanied his partner to the ring tonight while hobbling down on crutches and at various points getting involved in the match.

The match itself was OK. 

The crowd were on fire, which helped proceedings, but the actual action never went beyond decent, which pretty much sums up most of Starrcade 1990 so far. 

Towards the finish, Little Richard Marley went to jump off the top rope to assist Michael Hayes in breaking one of their opponents' legs, but Gibson knocked Marley off the ropes and straight into Jimmy Garvin. Garvin grabbed Marley by the throat, allowing Morton to get the roll-up for the three count.

Your Winners: Ricky Morton and Tommy Rich

Post-match, the Freebirds beat up Marley and double-suplexed him. Morton and Rich ran in for the save, but while they were distracted, Hayes and Garvin simply left the ring and knocked Gibson on his ass with a double clothesline. 

Stan 'The Larriat' Hansen Explains How a Strap Match Works

Out on the arena floor, Tony Schaivone interviewed US Champion Stan 'The Larriat' Hansen. 

As wild and out of control as ever, Hansen explained that he was defending the title in a "Texas Larriat" match and began to outline the rules, which were basically those of a strap match.

Hansen was a lot of fun here.

Pat O' Conner Tag Team Tournament - Semi Final
Team Mexico (Konnan & Rey Mysterio) vs. Team USA (Rick & Scott Steiner)

This was another one of those matches that just sort of seemed to be there. It was neither good nor bad, but just kind of happened.

The Steiners beat up on Konnan for a bit and nailed him with their patented top rope bulldog, then they beat up on Rey Mysterio, who Rick Steiner eventually put away with a powerbomb.

Your Winners: The Steiner Brothers 

Back on the arena floor, Tony Schiavone interviewed Four Horsemen members Arn Anderson & Barry Windham. 

The two started their promo while we were shown a video of Ric Flair recently getting dragged out of his limosine and attacked (hence Windham substituting for him tonight). 

This made it almost impossible to hear what Anderson was saying, and it was only later on that we heard him raging about how he and Windham had nothing to lose and would take it to Doom in their upcoming street fight.

Pat O' Conner Tag Team Tournament - Semi Final
Victor Zangiev & Salmon Hasimikov vs. Mr. Saito & The Great Muta 

This was much better than the previous match, but it wasn't fantastic or anything, just some very competent wrestling displayed in a very short space of time, all leading to a win for the Japanese contingent when Mr. Saito drilled one of the Russian dudes into the mat.

Your Winners: Mr. Saito & The Great Muta 

Out on the arena floor, Tony Schiavone spoke to Doom and their manager, Teddy Long, about the upcoming streetfight. 

An intense promo which -along with the earlier Horsemen promo- made you really believe that the two teams were vying for blood, this one saw Ron Simmons talk about how much he and Butch Reed had needed to fight for everything they had, while Reed himself claimed to have invented the street fight.

OK then.

Texas Larriat Match for the United States Championship
WCW United States Champion Stan Hansen vs. Lex Luger 

This was a compelling match which proved to be one of the best things on the card up until this point. 

Hansen brawled and mauled Luger while The Total Package used his size and brute strength to overpower the champion in an exciting contest which saw both men touch all three corners on multiple occasions.

Eventually, Luger got the fourth corner but took referee Marc Curtis out in the process. 

With the announcers claiming that a prone Curtis simply hadn't seen Luger hit that final corner, Nick Patrick came out and the match continued with Hansen finally touching all four corners.

However, just when you thought it was all over, Curtis popped back up and revealed that he had seen Luger hit all four corners after all, giving him the victory, and the title. 

This was good stuff.

Your Winner and NEW United States Champion: Lex Luger 

Post match, Lex gave a ringside promo to Jim Ross, telling him just how good it felt to once again be the new US Champion. 

World Championship Wrestling World Team Championship Street Fight
WCW Tag Team Champions Doom (Butch Reed & Ron Simmons w/ Teddy Long) vs. The Four Horsemen (Arn Anderson & Barry Windham)

This was a damn fine street fight right up until the silly finish. 

All four men went at it full bore, holding nothing back in a wild, chaotic, and violent street fight that was just incredibly fun to watch from start to..well, almost the finish. 

After a tremendous brawl, Barry Windham rolled up Butch Reed while Ron Simmons simultaneously covered Arn Anderson. Unsure of what to do, referee Nick Patrick simply counted the fall for both teams and the match just...somehow ended.

No Contest

It was a dumb finish, and while I get that the idea was to ensure neither team had to do the job, there's still better ways they could have done this. 

The fighting didn't even end there, either. Both teams brawled to the back as Paul E. and JR got really angry and confused about who had won the match. Eventually, as the Horsemen and Doom were separated, Ross told us that it was a no contest but Doom retained the gold. 

This was then followed by another commercial for Wrestlewar in which the voiceover told us we'd seen MAN VS. METAL. 

Hell yeah, I really hope that match is just some random dude taking on the concept of heavy metal music. 

Pat O' Conner Tag Team Tournament Final
Team Japan (The Great Muta & Mr. Saito) vs. Team USA (Rick & Scott Steiner)

During the introductions, GMC told us that this match would determine the WCW International Tag Team Champions. I'm pretty sure that was just a name only and that the company didn't introduce a third tag team title. 

This was another good match, although it did seem a little too similiar to some of the other contests in this tournament. 

The early part saw Scotty putting on a clinic in finesse with The Great Muta before The Dog Faced Gremlin tagged in and matched power and brawn with Mr. Saito. That was a great way to open the match before Scott played face in peril and even ate a spiked piledriver which Jim Ross was sure was going to end things.

It didn't. Scotty managed to make a blind tag to his brother, after which Rick came off the top rope with with a sunset flip for the cover, the count, and the tournament.

Your Winners: The Steiner Brothers 

Afterwards, The Steiners headed up to the top of the entrance way to meet Tony Schiavone.

Surrounded by the same flag-bearing women from the start of the show, with the giant 7-8ft trophy behind them, Schiavone introduced WCW president Jim Herd who first congratulated all of the teams who had taken part in the competition before finally congratulating "the two best superheavyweights [he'd] ever seen, The Steiner Brothers." 

As fireworks went off, Rick and Scott didn't give a traditional celebratory speech, but instead tipped their hats to the servicemen who were then currently fighting in Kuwait.

Steel Cage Title vs. Mask Match for the National Wrestling Alliance World Heavyweight Championship
NWA World Heavyweight Champion Sting vs. The Black Scorpion

Special Guest Referee: Dick The Bruiser

This was an interesting one in that the pre and post match goings on were far more interesting and entertaining than anything that actually happened bell to bell.

Things began with a gaggle of men dressed in Black Scorpion attire walking to the ring before a large contraption was lowered from the ceiling. 

JR mentioned that it looked like a space craft, though to this fan it looked much more like a giant lampshade. The lampshade-craft folded in on itself as The Black Scorpion's voice boomed through the PA, telling us that the other Scorpions were just his messengers while he was the real deal. 

The contraption then unfolded to reveal the challenger himself before returning to the ceiling. Cameras panned in on the Scorpion, and if it wasn't immediately and abundantly obvious to you who was underneath the mask then you'd clearly never seen a single NWA/WCW show in your life. 

After Sting made his entrance, the match got under way and proceeded to be the most boring thing you've ever witnessed. 

Half the problem was that despite being one of the greatest of all time, the man under the mask was unable to wrestle as he usually would, sticking to a very generic style in an attempt to hide his identity.

It didn't work. 

At various points, the fans began chanting the Scorpion's real identity and that was just about the only time they chanted anything.

Seriously, in all the time that I've been doing this, I don't think I've ever watched a main event play out to a quieter crowd.

Towards the finish, Sting ripped the challenger's mask off, only to reveal that he was wearing a second mask with a very distinctive tuft of blonde hair poking out of the back.

After a fairly dismal contest, Sting hit a flying crossbody to pick the predictable win.

Your Winner and Still World Heavyweight Champion: Sting

Post match, Sting attempted to unmask his nemesis, only for the fake Scorpion messengers to hit the ring and attack. The champion and special referee Dick The Bruiser began to attack them and strip them of their masks, revealing each man to be some generic jobber.

Before Sting could get his hands on the real deal, however, Anderson and Windham hit the ring and joined the fake Scorpions in a beat down. 

Z-Man, Ricky Morton and -I think- Terry Taylor all tried to help but couldn't get into the cage until The Steiners came down with some bolt cutters and finally -after a bit of a struggle- got the cage unlocked.

That managed to turn the tide, giving Sting an opportunity to finally rip his rival's mask off and reveal him to be, yes, Nature Boy Ric Flair.

Well, colour me shocked. 

The match sucked, but I won't lie that the ending was pretty exciting.

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That boring main event aside, Starrcade 1990: Collision Course was not at all a bad show. 

Though I'm not normally a fan of one-night tournaments, most of the Pat O' Conner stuff was decent while Wallstreet/Taylor and the opening Eaton/Z-Man clash were enjoyable in their own way.

The US title match was a lot of fun too, though match of the night simply has to go to the compelling Horsemen/Doom street fight which is well worth a watch.

Perhaps not the greatest Starrcade of all time, but certainly a decent show until it fell off a cliff with the main event. 

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Other 1990 pro wrestling reviews: 

• WWF Royal Rumble 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions X: Texas Shoot Out
• WCW Wrestlewar 1990
• WWF Wrestlemania XI
• WCW Capital Combat 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions XI - Costal Crush 
• WCW The Great American Bash 1990
• WWF Summerslam 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions XII - Fall Brawl '90: Mountain Madness 
• WCW Clash of the Champions XIII - Thanksgiving Thunder
• WWF Survivor Series 1990

Other NWA/WCW Starrcade reviews:

• NWA Starrcade 1983
• NWA Starrcade 1984
• NWA Starrcade 1985
• NWA Starrcade 1986
• NWA Starrcade 1987
• NWA/WCW Starracde 1988
• NWA/WCW Starrcade 1989
• WCW Starrcade 1996
• WCW Starrcade 1997
• WCW Starrcade 1998
• WCW Starrcade 1999
• WCW Starrcade 2000

Be the first to catch the latest Retro Pro Wrestling reviews by following on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter @RetroPWrestling. 

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PPV REVIEW: WWE No Mercy 2002

October 20, 2002, 

Alltel Arena, North Little Rock, Arkansas

WWE No Mercy 2002 came to us in the midst of storyline that has since gone down in history as one of the worst of all time:

The Kane/Katy Vicky Saga.

As if anybody needs reminding, this was a time when Triple H decided that he didn't like Kane being happy, so accused him of murdering a girl called Katie Vick as a result of drunk driving. 

Not content with that, The Game proceeded to shag a mannequin that was supposed to be Katie, a moment few wrestling fans who saw it have ever forgotten.

The dumbest part of all this was that it was entirely unnecessary.

The Cerebral Assasin and The Big Red Machine were set to meet tonight at No Mercy in a match that would unify the World Heavyweight Championship, a story that itself was steeped in enough significance that it could have surely been enough to give the two men a compelling reason to meet.

Regardless, this is where we found ourselves tonight as No Mercy came live from North Little Rock, Arkansas.

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Winner Take All

No Mercy 2002 began with a cold open featuring The Undertaker sitting in the locker room looking at his injured hand.

At that point, his brother Kane walked in, took a seat, and asked “so, how’s your week been?”

It was a pretty funny moment despite the fact that the two had been in some pretty intense storylines.

The obligatory opening video then showed us that Kane had been at war with Triple H during the infamous Katie Vick debacle.

The two would face off tonight in a winner-take-all match with Kane’s Intercontinental title and The Game’s World Heavyweight Championship both on the line.

Meanwhile, ‘Taker was still engaged in a bitter rivalry with WWE Champion Brock Lesnar after the two failed to settle things last month at Unforgiven 2002.

Tonight, they’d look to end things once and for all in a Hell in a Cell.

With that, we got crowd shots and pyro (but nothing from The World which was new) as Jim Ross and Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler welcomed us to the show.

From there, it was down to ringside for our opening contest.

WWE World Tag Team Championship
WWE Tag Team Champions Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Booker T & Goldust

So, does Christian have the distinction of being the only man to have separate tag team title reigns with both members of The Thrillseekers?

I think so. I also haven’t been watching the ‘tween-PPV tv shows as of late so I’ve no idea how Christian’s alliance with Lance Storm came to an end, but here we are.

Regardless of how they got together, Christian and Chris Jericho entered into a spirited performance with Booker T & Goldust, the result of which was a very fun opening match.

The champs cut Goldust off for the first part of the match before Booker T got involved to the delight of the live crowd.

We then got several moments of wild action before Jericho attempted a springboard dropkick on Booker only for the middle rope to completely snap, causing Y2J to collapse in a heap.

The former Undisputed Champion recovered well, hurling Book out of the ring then polishing off Goldust with a DDT onto the title belt and a top rope moonsault that was even more impressive given that he had no middle rope to help him up to the top.

Even with the scary moment when the rope broke, this was a great opener.

Your Winners and Still Tag Team Champions: Chris Jericho & Christian

Backstage, Smackdown’s Number One Announcer, Funaki questioned Al Wilson about his goings-on with Dawn Marie.

Funaki showed Wilson two separate instances in which Marie had given him a peak at her body and asked how those peaks made him feel.

Wilson ummed and ah’d but never answered the question, so Funaki then showed him footage of Torrie Wilson catching her dad in the shower with Dawn.

In slow, broken English the man with the microphone asked:

“So, Funaki have one question: Why you wear your clothes in the shower?”

Wilson ignored that and simply gave a very dated Bill Clinton reference by insisting that he did not have sexual relations with that woman.

Way to keep it relevant, Al.

Mr. Wilson may not have been much good here, but Funaki was good, especially when he gave us the punchline to the whole segment, speaking in further slow, broken English as he said:

“It seems...that Al...Wilson...does not understand English.”

Brilliant. I laughed so damn hard at that.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Dawn Marie made her way to the ring as the crew were still fixing the ropes.

The match was never going to be a classic, but it was the best it could be given each woman’s skill level and it certainly didn’t stink.

Dawn Marie spent most of the match mauling Torrie before they went into the same old tired spot that got done in every match involving two hot women:

Both girls get in a cat fight, end up rolling around on top of the referee and the referee likes it too much.

Yawn.

That was lame, but the rest of the match was OK for what it was.

After spending most of the time getting her butt whooped, Wilson pulled off a swinging neck breaker to score the fall.

Your Winner: Torrie Wilson

Backstage, Rob Van Dam gave an entertaining interview to Jonathan Coachman about his rivalry and upcoming match with Ric Flair.

Flair had turned heel on RVD by costing him a title match against HHH back at Unforgiven. The two would lock up later, but for now Mr. PPV claimed that he not time for styling, profiling, limos or jets as he was a chair smashing, frog splashing, ying-yanging man named Rob Van Dam.

That was good stuff from RVD. What wasn’t so good was that Coach then saw Paul Heyman, Brock Lesnar and Undertaker’s ex, Tracy, all heading through the back.

Lesnar and Heyman had nothing to say but Tracy wanted Coach to know that ‘Taker was a scumbag and would get what was coming to him tonight.

Nature Boy Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam

This was neither man’s greatest ever match, but it was still a solid effort with a lot to enjoy.

Ever the veteran, Flair spent time attacking RVD’s greatest weapon, his two legs, and even locked him in the figure four.

Van Dam made a comeback and one frog splash later picked up a big victory following a decent contest.

Your Winner: Rob Van Dam

Backstage, Big Show was seen venting his frustrations to Stephanie McMahon, much to the chagrin of Raw GM Eric Bischoff.

As Show’s boss, Easy E wanted to know just what was going on, so the giant let him have it, bemoaning the fact that he hadn’t been featured on a PPV since July and hadn’t headlined a show in ages despite the fact that he was 7ft, 500 pounds and a former WWE and WCW champion.

Bischoff berated his employee for daring to take that kind of tone with him, so Big Show grabbed hold of him and threatened to break his neck if things didn’t change.

How Awesome Was the Intercontinental Championship?

Tonight’s winner-take-all match meant that this would be the last time the Intercontinental Championship would be defended as it got absorbed with the world title.

As a final farewell, WWE gave us an awesome video package highlighting the history of the prestigious title and showcasing just about every man to ever hold the title.

It was very good, not least because it gave us a few shots of the much-missed Owen Hart.

Honestly, this made you question why ok earth WWE would get rid of the belt in the first place.

The video made it look like HHH vs. Kane was next, but it wasn’t.

Instead we got this:

WWE Cruiserweight Championship
WWE Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble (w/ Nidia) vs. Tajiri

This was as solid a Cruiserweight match as you were going to get from WWE, an exciting back and forth with lots of unique spots and plenty to enjoy.

After a compelling battle, Tajiri looked to have the match won, but Nidia snogged the referee’s face off so that he couldn’t count the fall.

She then prevented the challenger from executing a roll-up, allowing her man to retain the gold.

Your Winner and Still Cruiserweight Champion: Jamie Noble

Post-match, Tajiri kissed Nidia. Irate, Noble then went to show his rival how it was done but got kicked in the back of the head by the Japanese Buzz Saw.”

Chavo Gets His Butt Handed to Him

Out in the back, Chris Benoit warned Eddie Guerrero that Kurt Angle was whooping Chavo Guerrero’s butt.

Concerned, Uncle Eddie raced to the rescue but then stopped short of entering the room where the assault was taking place.

As Chavo screamed for help from behind closed doors, Eddie reached the conclusion that it had all been a rouse and, in a hilarious moment, mistook his nephew’s voice for that of a little girl.

When Chavo was finally sent hurling through the door, Eddie pounced on Angle but was immediately stopped by two officials, which begs the question as to why said officials did nothing to stop Angle destroying Chavo.

Winner Take All
WWE World Heavyweight Champion Triple H vs. Kane

On any other night, a title unification match for the World Heavyweight Championship and the Intercontinental Championship would have been a big enough story in its own right.

WWE being what they were (and many would say, still are), they all but ignored the significance of such an event and instead focused on a dumb story involving Kane’s friend Katie Vick dying in a car accident while he was at the wheel and Triple H shagging a mannequin in a coffin while wearing a Kane mask.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, the first half of this match was pretty lifeless.

Things picked up when Ric Flair got involved to start running interference for his protégé. We even got the briefest of cameos from Kane’s tag team partner Hurricane who got immediately pedigreed and spent the rest of the match napping on the outside.

Flair’s shenanigans did liven things up a bit and gave us a finishing sequence that was at least more exciting than the first part of the match, but it was nothing out of the ordinary for a PPV title match.

After an underwhelming match, The Game scored the pinfall thanks to the pedigree.

Your Winner and Still World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H

So long IC title...for now.

Tracy Confesses

Back in Stephanie McMahon’s office, Tracy confessed to the Smackdown GM that she’d made up having an affair with The Undertaker at Paul Heyman’s request and had gone along with it because she wanted “Mark” back.

Unbeknownst to her, Mark had been listening in from behind the door and heard the whole thing. He walked in, called her a lying bitch, and left again.

WWE Tag Team Championship
Rey Mysterio & Edge vs. Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit

This was just such a tremendous match I’m almost tempted to go back and rewatch it.

Stephanie McMahon had created the WWE Tag Team Championship to give Smackdown its own duos title only to realise that she had no real tag teams on her roster.

Make shift teams like Edge & Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit had been formed and had gone on to duke it out in a tournament to determine the first ever champions.

This was the final, and what a final it was.

Exceptional wrestling, jaw-dropping high spots, Rey Mysterio getting thrown 500ft in the air by Benoit and Angle, this match had it all...

...OK, so 500ft may be an exaggeration, but it’s no exaggeration to say that this was a truly excellent match, one which ended when Angle made Edge tap to the ankle lock.

Your Winners and first ever WWE tag team Champions: Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit

01.58.26 - TAKER

Backstage, Undertaker bullied a medic into giving him a shot. In a rare moment of vulnerability, ‘Taker admitted that without a shot to help him with his injured hand, he wouldn’t survive Hell in a Cell.

WWE Women’s Championship
WWE Women’s Champion Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

As Victoria made her way out for her debut PPV match, Jim Ross described her as being “permanently pre-menstrual,” a comment that was so problematic even Jerry Lawler of all people called him out on it.

Questionable commentary aside, this was a decent match, not great by any stretch, but competently performed and inoffensive.

After a few minutes of getting battered by the challenger, Trish Stratus picked up the three count to retain her title.

Your Winner and Still Women’s Champion: Trish Stratus

Before the main event, we went over to The World, where Rikishi told us about that time Undertaker pushed him off the top of the cell at Armageddon 2000 in a spot that was nowhere near as impressive as WWE made it out to be.

We then got one final video package for Taker vs. Brock and then it was on with the match.

Hell in a Cell Match for the WWE Championship
WWE Champion Brock Lesnar (w/ Paul Heyman) vs. The Undertaker

This incredible match was proof positive that sometimes less really is so much more and that Hell in a Cell match didn’t need insane, Foleyesque stunts to be effective.

In fact, neither ‘Taker nor Brock ever left the cell, instead choosing to destroy each other -and I mean utterly *destroy* each other- inside the structure.

Lesnar immediately went after his opponent's injured hand but the challenger fought back and battered Brock to a bloody pulp outside the ring.

‘Taker was even able to get his hands on Paul Heyman and attack him to the point that Lesnar’s manager bled beautifully.

The sight and sound of Heyman, his face dripping with blood, screaming desperately from outside the cage, begging ‘Taker to show mercy and then begging Brock to fight back, really added something special to what was already an amazing match.

The tides turned once again and Brock took charge, ensuring his rival also donned the proverbial crimson mask...except it wasn’t so much a mask for Undertaker. He bled so much that it was more like a crimson all-over body suit.

Anyway, things went back and forth in an awesome display of brutality until finally, the champion countered a Tombstone with an F5 to retain the gold.

Your Winner and Still WWE Champion: Brock Lesnar

As the show went off the air, Lesnar grabbed his title and stood atop the cage as a battered, bloody, and defeated Dead Man looked on in despair.

Honestly, that was one of the most compelling matches I’ve ever seen in all my years as a wrestling fan and one I’m definitely adding to my favourites.

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If you fast forward through the World Heavyweight Championship match and don’t set your expectations too high for the women’s matches, No Mercy 2002 proved to be a very enjoyable show from start to finish.

The opening tag match, Cruiserweight Championship and, to a lesser extent, RVD/Flair all delivered, and while the Smackdown tag title match was so good that it seemed certain to steal the show, it was topped by a brutal, bloody, and utterly enthralling main event that has to be considered one of the best Hell in a Cell matches of all time.

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Other 2002 pro wrestling reviews: 

• WWF Royal Rumble 2002 
• WWF No Way Out 2002 
• WWA - The Revolution
• WWF Wrestlemania X8
• WWF Backlash 2002
• WWF Insurrexion 2002 
• WWE Judgement Day 2002
• NWA-TNA: Weekly PPV #1
• WWE King of the Ring 2002
• WWE Vengeance 2002
• WWE Global Warning 2002
• WWE Summerslam 2002
• WWE Unforgiven 2002

Other WWE No Mercy reviews:

• WWF No Mercy UK 1999
• WWF No Mercy US 1999
• WWF No Mercy 2000
• WWF No Mercy 2001

Be the first to catch the latest Retro Pro Wrestling reviews by following on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter @RetroPWrestling.

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EVENT REVIEW: WCW Clash of the Champions XIII - Thanksgiving Thunder

November 20th, 1990 

Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida. 

Clash of the Champions 13 - Thanksgiving Thunder saw World Championship Wrestling at weird time.

After rising to the height of popularity, Sting had finally captured the World Heavyweight Championship, only to find himself lacking any serious, credible challengers outside of the man he beat for the title, Nature Boy Ric Flair.

Instead of actually creating any serious, credible challengers, the WCW braintrust created The Black Scorpion, supposedly a dark and mysterious figure from Sting's past (with it being hinted that it might be his former partner, The Ultimate Warrior), but who was really just a goof in a mask who did stage magic and made ominous threats over the PA system.

The gimmick -and, indeed, the whole story line- clearly didn't work, but, as we'll see tonight, WCW were not ones to give up on a bad idea.

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Here's what went down when Clash of the Champions XIII - Thanksgiving Thunder came to us live from Jacksonville, Florida.

Thanksgiving Thunder

We began tonight’s show with a basic intro featuring clips of WCW’s stars beating the hell out of each other, all framed in log tuning bolts...get it, because thunder?

Anyway, we then went live to the arena where Jim Ross and Paul E. Dangerously put over the stipulations for tonight’s main event.

Not only was a tag team title shot on the line, but if Butch Reed won, then Teddy Long would get Ric Flair’s limo and yacht whereas if Nature Boy won, Long would have to be his chauffeur for the day.

Hmm.

Moving on, Dangerously ranted and raved about how we could talk to Lex Luger on the WCW Hotline before JR sent it to Garry Michael Capetta for our opening contest.

The Fabulous Freebirds (Michael ‘P.S’ Hayes & Jimmy ‘Jam’ Garvin w/ Little Richard Marley) vs. The Wild Eyed Southern Boys (Tracy Smothers & Steve Armstrong)

I often write these reviews months in advance, and right now it feels both fitting and incredibly sad that, less than 24 hours after learning of “Beautiful” Bobby Eaton’s passing, the first wrestling match I sat down to review looked to set to feature the Midnight Express legend.

This was all set to be a six-man, featuring Bobby teaming with Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin to face Tracy Smothers, Steve Armstrong, and El Gigante.

Alas, the Freebirds shot themselves in the foot before the match could start by grabbing the microphone and taking credit for El Gigante’s alleged disappearance.

The referee then declared that since Hayes had owned up to some shady doings, this would now be a regular tag match and Eaton had to go to the back. 

These two teams had a great match back at Clash of the Champions XI, and this looked like it was going to be on par with that.

Unfortunately, it was a much shorter bout than their last effort, and after about 6 short minutes of exciting tag team action, Little Richard Marley tripped up Tracy Smothers, allowing Hayes to hit the match-winning DDT.

Your Winners: The Fabulous Freebirds

Out in the arena, Tony Schiavone interviewed Sting. 

The World Heavyweight champion didn’t have much to say. He simply bounced up and down a lot and confirmed that he was fighting Black Scorpion again tonight.

He didn’t get to elaborate as he was interrupted by Ole Anderson’s Black Scorpion voice echoing through the PA.

Scorpion likewise said nothing that actually meant anything, it was simply a case of “listen to how spooky snd scary I am.”

To his credit, he did promise to show off some of his black magic. I’m telling you now, if that magic ends up being half as hilariously bad as his stunt at Halloween Havoc 90, I can’t wait for it.

Nature Boy Buddy Landel vs. Flyin’ Brian Pillman

This rematch from Great American Bash 1990 was a pretty good effort which saw Buddy Landell using all the devious heel tactics he could to counter Brian Pillman’s high-flying offence.

Of course, Pillman was the real star here.

He looked incredibly impressive and so it came as no surprise when he came off the top rope with a flying crossbody and won the match.

Your Winner: Brian Pillman

After another reminder that we could speak to Lex Luger on the WCW hotline, we next got a promo for Starrcade ‘90: Colission Course.

The video told us that Sting would face The Black Scorpion, which was news to me as I thought the earlier promo meant that said match was happening tonight.

It also promised us a universal tag team attraction featuring the best tag teams “from across the cosmos.” 

I won’t lie, that tag team thing actually looked pretty cool.

The Big Cat vs. ‘The Candy Man’ Brad Armstrong

No, this wasn’t Ernie Ladd. It was a young Curtis ‘Mr.’ Hughes in an early gimmick.

As he made his way to the ring for his I first appearance at a big WCW event, we got some pre-recorded comments from Cat in which he promised he was here to beat everyone up and that he had his sights firmly set on Lex Luger.

Before he could get to The Total Package, however, Cat first had to dispose of ‘The Candy Man’ Brad Armstrong who’s gimmick was...

...I don’t know, that he really liked candy or something?

Whatever he was supposed to be, Armstrong was really just there to serve as a warm body for Big Cat to throw around, which he did so in impressive fashion.

Indeed, watching this charismatic, well-built dude look like a star in the making here, it’s almost impossible to believe that he’s the same guy I just wrote about a few weeks ago as having an awful match with Sal Bellomo at ECW The Night the Line Was Crossed.

Anyway, Cat, trying to get Luger’s attention, lifted Armstrong up in the torture rack, and even though The Candy Man didn’t give up, the referee took mercy on him and stopped the match.

Your Winner: Big Cat 

Before the commercial, we got a word from Dick The Bruiser.

Sounding like he smoked 60 cigarettes a day, The Bruiser told us that he was known throughout the land as the toughest wrestler and the toughest referee in the world. As such, he was able to guarantee us a winner when he officiated the main event of Starrcade.

‘Prime Time’ Brian Lee vs. The Z-Man

As The Z-Man made his way to the ring, Jim Ross told us that he was one of the more popular wrestlers in WCW and the crowd response seemed to back that claim up.

That was surprising as on previous shows that I’ve reviewed he was mainly used as cannon fodder for other wrestlers.

His opponent tonight was future Summerslam ‘94 headliner ‘Prime Time’ Brian Lee, making his WCW debut.

The match was decent for what it was, and even though all of these Clash matches were usually short to fit around commercials, Z-Man and Lee made the best out of the time allotted to them.

Of course, I’m not saying that this was a classic or anything, but it was perfectly acceptable for an undercard bout on a TV

Z-Man won, which was a rarity.

Your Winner: The Z-Man

After the break, we went live to Tony Schiavone who was standing by with Michael Wallstreet and Alexandra York.

Wallstreet scalded Schiavone for calling him Mike Rotunda and revealed that he had legally changed his name to Michael Wallstreet after inheriting a large sum of money.

He then introduced us to his administrative assistant, Alexandra York, making this Terri Runnel’s first appearance on a big event.

York showed us a computer print out of a strategy she had compiled for Wallstreet using data on his upcoming opponent, The Starblazer.

According to Ms. York, as long as her man followed it to the letter, he would have no problem winning his match.

The Starblazer vs. Michael Wallstreet (w/ Alexandra York)

If you’re anything like me and had no idea who the heck The Starblazer was, it was apparently ‘White Lightning’ Tim Horner in a generic luchadore costume.

York’s strategy for Wallstreet seemed to work as he basically mauled his opponent, but the crowds were silent except for a small but noticeable ‘boring’ chant.

To be honest, you can’t blame them for that. While this wasn’t terrible either, it was lifeless and as formulaic as Starblazer’s attire.

The end came when Starblazer botched whatever move he was going for and ended up just deliberately laying down so that his opponent could put him in a Boston crab.

The former Captain Mike followed that up with a Samoan Drop he called the Wallstreet Crash and put his opponent, the crowd, and this writer out of our collective misery.

Your Winner: Michael Wallstreet 

Up next, Gordon Sollie shilled WCW’s magazine, The Wrestling Wrap-Up which led us into our top ten rankings for both the tag team division and singles competition.

The tag division seemed like a stretch as the bottom three were all make-shift teams featuring guys who had maybe only tagged together on a handful of occasions, while the singles rankings featured US champion Stan Hansen in the top spot, making him one step away from world champion Sting.

We then had Jim Ross tell us that the upcoming tag team tournament was in honour of the late, great Pat O’ Conner, would feature teams from all over the world and would be held at Starrcade.

That led us to our next match, where two teams would duke it out for the right to represent Africa in the tournament.

Pat O’ Conner International Tag Team Tournament African Qualifier
Sgt. Krueger & Col. Deklerk vs. Kalua & The Botswana Beast

Yet more names that I had to Google here.

Col. Deklerk was Ted ‘Flyboy Rocco Rock’ Petty while opinion seems to be divided as to whether Matt Borne or Ray Apollo played Sgt. Krueger.

One things for sure though, none of them were African.

Meanwhile, all signs point to Kalua being Larry ‘Thunderbolt’ Hamilton and the Botswana Beast being played by Bill Tabb, which doesn’t really help here as I’m not familiar with either of them but I’m pretty sure neither of them were African either.

Anyway, this was interesting because it started well enough with some nice wrestling between Kalua and Deklerk, but then The Botswana Beast tagged in and proved that outside of throwing a huge -and admittedly impressive- flying clothesline, he was a pretty terrible and awkward wrestler.

The rest of the match just completely fell apart, with all four men looking lost and having no idea what to do.

Deklerk and Krueger won when referee Randy Anderson shuffled awkwardly into position so that he couldn’t see them doing a double team move and then counted the fall.

I don’t say this often, but that was really, really bad.

Your Winners: Sgt. Krueger & Col. Deklerk

After the match, we went to a pre-recorded bit where legendary promoter Sam Muchnik invited all the wrestling fans to join him at Starrcade for the tag team tournament.

Muchnik was clearly reading from a script and didn’t care about this at all. I doubt anybody bought a ticket or PPV stream on the back of this.

Hansen and Luger Hate Each Other

Up next, we looked back at Clash of the Champions 12 when Stan Hansen attacked Lex Luger before going on to beat him for the US title at Halloween Havoc.

Weirdly, this didn’t set up a rematch between the two tonight but instead the announcers went on to tell us that Paul E. Dangerously had found some dude called The Motor City Mad Man who was going to fight Luger instead.

Before that match, Luger was about to talk about his various feuds when Big Cat approached him, only to get punched in the face and left seething.

The Motor City Mad Man vs. Lex Luger 

Yet another guy I’d never heard of, The Motor City Mad Man was Mike Moore who apparently was in a tag team called The Motor City Mad Men managed by Dangerously in the 80s.

Before his predictable loss to Luger, The Mad Man had to wait while Big Cat attacked the Total Package.

The referees eventually broke that up, and what we got was a pretty poor match that was saved only by Luger’s popularity.

After a few minutes of sloppy action, the former US champion put his opponent away with a clothesline.

Your Winner: Lex Luger 

After another Starrcade promo, Tony Schiavone interviewed Nick Patrick. Patrick informed us that The Steiner Brothers had been told off for trying to end the careers of The Nasty Boys.

So that was happening.

The Renegade Warriors (Chris & Mark Youngblood) vs. The Nasty Boys (Brian Knobbs & Jerry Sags)

For what it was, this was a good match. The Nasty Boys had looked very impressive in their short 1990 run in WCW and although they’d be in the WWF for a run as cartoon characters very soon, they looked just as impressive here.

Meanwhile, The Renegade Warriors also brought their A-game and were starting to get over -to a degree- with the live crowd.

Those factors led to a fun match which ended when The Steiners ran in to attack Brian Knobbs and Jerry Sags.

Your Winners via Disqualification: The Nasty Boys 

Afterwards, The Nasties simply ran off. 

Vader is Back...Kinda 

Big Van Vader had debuted back at The Great American Bash and then hadn’t been seen -at least not on Clash shows or PPV- since.

A graphic told us that he was back, but that was literally it. There was no promo or hype video and he wasn’t shown again on this show unless it was in a bit that got cut out of the Network version.

The Nightstalker vs. Sid Vicious 

The Night Stalker was Bryan “Adam Bomb” Clarke carrying a ridiculous, oversized toy ax.

Sid Vicious was, well he was The Master of the World and a man who could never truly be a heel because the fans always loved him.

As the Four Horsemen representative made his way to the ring, we got some pre-recorded comments in which he promised to come after Sting as soon as he got done with The Night Stalker.

The match wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t great either.

The two behemoths tried a test of strength, then Night Stalker put Sid in a bear hug, then he did this really weird thing where he put him in the ropes and just lay his hands on Sid’s side like he was some kind of faith healer.

That was about the whole match. Big Cat came down for seemingly no reason and Night Stalker just had to stand around awkwardly waiting while Sid took care of him.

The Horseman then used Stalker’s own ridiculous axe toy against him to win the match.

Why didn’t he get DQ’d for using an international object? Because for the second time tonight, Randy Anderson had to awkwardly position himself so that he couldn’t see it, this time by taking a short nap in the corner despite not being touched.

Your Winner: Sid 

Post match, Stalker and Cat got their asses handed to them by The Ruler of The World.

That was a very clumsy and poorly executed finish.

El Gigante is Here After All

Up next, The Fabulous Free Birds bragged about sending El Gigante packing back to Argentina, but then The Southern Boys turned up with street clothes wearing giant in tow.

I read somewhere that the reason Gigante hadn’t been in the match was that he missed his flight, but he’d clearly caught a later one and managed to make it for this nothing segment.

I wouldn’t have bothered.

With that over, Missy Hyatt reminded us to watch her and Jim Ross call a match between Arn Anderson and Terry Taylor on Main Event.

A recap of the Steiners attacking The Nasty Bots followed, after which we got to see Rick & Scott in action.

Magnum Force vs. NWA United States Tag Team Champions The Steiner Brothers (Rick & Scott Steiner)

You know, I’ve been watching pro wrestling since 1992 and I’ve been writing these reviews for almost ten years now and yet never before have I ever had to Google “who the f**k are these guys?” more than I have with Clash of the Champions 13.

Truth is, even after Google I still don’t know who Magnum Force are as the consensus seems to be that the original Force had been replaced by two other wrestlers and nobody can quite agree what their names are. 

Not that it really mattered.

Magnum Force were clearly jobbers and were easily disposed of in a quick match that was barely worth watching.

Your Winners: The Steiner Brothers 

Post match, The Nasties ran in but quickly got sent packing out of the arena, out of WCW, and into the waiting arms of Titan Sports.

A Word With The Horsemen

Up next, Ric Flair reminded Doom that they would have to walk that aisle as he, Tony Schiavone and Arn Anderson went over the stipulations for our main event.

As they did so, stagehands could be seen setting up some contraption for more of The Black Scorpion’s cheap stage magic.

Flair was as good as he ever was in this promo, but to be honest, this Clash show has been such a clusterf**k to write about that it’s hard to maintain interest at this point.

The Black Scorpion is a Magician 

Up next, Sting came out to tell Paul E. Dangerously that he was ready to come face to face with The Black Scorpion, but instead The Scorpion dragged a plant out of the crowd, made his head rotate 360 using a magic box, then turned him into a tiger.

For his final act, Scorpion made himself disappear.

This was all supposed to be  evidence of the Black Scorpion’s super powers, but it was nothing you couldn’t see watching any stage magician in the land.

It was also made worse by the fact that Paul Heyman and Sting both started shouting over what was very clearly some pre-recorded audio of Ole Anderson doing his Scorpion voice.

Silly.

WCW Tag Team Champion Butch Reed (w/ Teddy Long and Ron Simmons) vs. Nature Boy Ric Flair (w/ TV Champion Arn Anderson)

The deal here was that we didn’t know which two men would represent their teams and it was to be decided by a coin toss.

Except it wasn’t. At least not entirely. 

Doom called Heads, but then Nick Patrick simply asked Teddy Long who was going to represent them and he picked Butch Reed. 

Surely he could have done that without a coin toss?

Flair and Anderson’s coin toss was a little more like how it’s supposed to be done. Flair also called heads, heads it was, and thus he got to wrestle.

With that done, Jim Ross reminded us of what was at stake.

If The Horsemen won, they would get a tag team title shot at Starrcade and Teddy Long would have to be their chauffeur for the day.

If Doom won, there was to be no Starrcade match and Long would get both Ric Flair’s 65ft yacht and his limo. 

Unsurprisingly, this was the best match on the card by a country mile and was the first time all night that the crowd really came to life.

OK, so it wasn’t Flair’s greatest match ever, but given the caliber of his work, that’s hardly a criticism.

This was still very, very good and made sitting through all the crap that went before it very much worth it.

At one point, Reed looked to have the match won thanks to an awesome top rope shoulder tackle, but Long was arguing with Patrick on the outside so there was nobody to make the count.

Then Ron Simmons took out Flair and again, Reed could have won, but this time Arn Anderson hit him with a chair.

Flair got the cover, Anderson threw Patrick in the ring and that was that.

Your Winner: Ric Flair

The Horsemen and Doom now had a date with destiny at Starrcade.

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You know, I’ve been enjoying watching all of these old WCW shows simply because I never got to see them as a kid due to the company’s non-existent TV exposure here in the UK.

Even when the matches have been poor, nostalgia has kept me invested, but not with this one.

Clash of the Champions XIII was a chore to watch.

Sure, a couple of the undercard matches were decent, but they weren’t enough to make up for the number of squash matches featuring no mark jobbers and that abysmal “none of us are actually African” African qualifying match.

Still, the main event was fantastic. If you’re even mildly curious, enjoy the opening Freebirds/Southern Boys match then skip out all of the other crap until you get to the awesome Flair/Reed match.

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Other 1990 pro wrestling reviews: 

• WWF Royal Rumble 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions X: Texas Shoot Out
• WCW Wrestlewar 1990
• WWF Wrestlemania XI
• WCW Capital Combat 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions XI - Costal Crush 
• WCW The Great American Bash 1990
• WWF Summerslam 1990
• WCW Clash of the Champions XII - Fall Brawl '90: Mountain Madness 
• WWF Survivor Series 1990

Other Clash of the Champions Reviews:

• NWA Clash of the Champions 1 
• WCW Clash of the Champions X: Texas Shootout 
• WCW Clash of the Champions XI - Costal Crush 
• WCW Clash of the Champions XII - Fall Brawl '90: Mountain Madness 

Be the first to catch the latest Retro Pro Wrestling reviews by following on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter @RetroPWrestling. 

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