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Despite growing up in the UK, I was only just getting into wrestling when WWF UK Rampage '92 came out, and never got to see it in the years that followed.
Even once Peacock and the former WWE Network came about, it never really occurred to me to track this one down until I started work on the second Retro Pro Wrestling book, The Complete History of WWE's UK PPVS: 1991 - 2003.
So here I am at last, ready to check out what the VHS cover promises to be "2 1/2 hours of explosive video action."
Enjoy the review, and if you'd like to support Retro Pro Wrestling, get yourself a copy of the ebook below (print version coming in January) or read it for free on Kindle Unlimited.
Welcome to UK Rampage
Our show began with a brief and basic introduction featuring clips of some of the superstars we’d see tonight.
You want Bret Hart? Repo Man? Virgil? Tatanka?
You got em!
From there, we went live to the Sheffield Arena were our hosts, Bobby ‘The Brain’ Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon welcomed us to the show and ran down tonight’s card.
Having never seen this show before, I can tell you now that I’m particularly looking forward to Shawn Michaels challenging Macho Man Randy Savage for the world title as well as Bret Hart defending the Intercontinental Championship against Rick Martel.
With the pre-amble out of the way, Monsoon sent us down to ring announcer, Mike McGuirk (remember her?) for our opening contest.
Tatanka vs. Skinner
Is it just me, or did Tatanka always look way cooler in those white tights than he did in the trunks he’d wear for most of his career?
Honestly, I had few expectations for this match, but both Tatanka and Skinner worked their butts off to deliver the best opening contest they were capable of delivering.
After the babyface took control in the early going, Skinner managed to get the upper hand and decimated his opponent before Tatanka picked up the win with a Samoan Drop.
It’s crazy to think that such a move was an effective finisher back in the early 1990s.
That aside, despite not being the best match of all time, this was still an enjoyable way to kick off UK Rampage ‘92.
Your Winner: Tatanka
Out in the back, Sean Mooney interviewed The Legion of Doom about their upcoming match against the makeshift team of Col. Mustafa and Dino Bravo.
Animal ranted and raved about how much they were going to beat their opponents before Hawk waxed poetical about fluid sacs and splintered sphincters.
It was a crazy promo, but I have to admit, the old-school fan in me enjoyed it a lot.
Col. Mustafa and Dino Bravo vs. The Legion of Doom (Hawk & Animal)
Prior to the bell, Mustafa, better known to you and me as The Iron Sheik, grabbed the microphone to blast both the United States and the United Kingdom.
From there, he and Bravo entered into a lackluster affair with Hawk & Animal, getting their heads kicked in for the better part of four and half minutes before a flying clothesline from Hawk gave the LOD the predictable win.
This wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t all that entertaining either.
Your Winners: The Legion of Doom
As Hawk and Animal celebrated, Gorilla Monsoon told us that we were going to his colleague, Shawn Michaels, who was standing by with Sid Justice.
Monsoon, of course, meant Sean Mooney, who reminded Sid of his boast of being ‘The Master and Ruler of the World.’
Agreeing that he was exactly that, Sid referenced William McGivern’s best-selling novel, The Night of the Juggler, as he talked about picking up The Undertaker by his throat and slamming him to the mat.
Sid was calculated, intense, and sinister, and it made for an awesome promo. Man, I can’t deny it, I love Sid.
Offering a retort, The Undertaker’s manager Paul Bearer warned Sid that there was no justice in death, before The Dead Man claimed to have followed his upcoming opponent across the sea just to give him a tombstone.
The two would meet next.
Sid Justice (w/ Harvey Wippleman) vs. The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer)
After an introduction from Harvey Wippleman (who first threatened to slap referee Tim White), Sid made his way to the ring ranting about himself and referring to himself as “Sycho Sid” some 4 years before he would officially adopt that moniker.
The match itself was nothing special. The Undertaker was still in his Zombie Mortician character which meant he did very little, and as awesome as Sid might have been, he wasn’t the guy to turn this into a stellar classic.
Still, while it wasn’t the greatest match in the world, Sid Justice vs. The Undertaker was still a spectacle in its own right, and -for nostalgia purposes if nothing else- this writer enjoyed watching it.
The end came when both men battled on the outside but ‘Taker took his sweet ass time getting back in the ring and was counted out.
Your Winner via Countout: Sid Justice
Post-match, The Master and The Ruler of the World rattled The Dead Man with a steel chair, only for ‘Taker to pop back up and plant his foe with a tombstone to the delight of the Sheffield faithful.
Shawn Michaels is Shocking
With Sensational Sherri hanging from his body, Shawn Michaels told Sean Mooney that his good looks, his physique and his wrestling ability were all shocking, and tonight he was going to shock the world, not because he was the Shockmaster, but because he was going to dethrone Macho Man Randy Savage for the World Wrestling Federation Heavyweight Championship.
Michaels wasn’t quite the five-star promo he would later become here, but this was nonetheless a strong, confident performance from the future Hall of Famer.
World Wrestling Federation Championship WWF Champion Macho Man Randy Savage (w/ Miss. Elizabeth) vs. Shawn Michaels (w/ Sensational Sherri)
Unless you know absolutely nothing about pro wrestling, it shouldn’t come as much of a surprise to you when I say that Michaels vs. Savage was the best thing on the card up to this point.
I vaguely recall reading somewhere that one of the reasons Macho jumped ship from the WWF to WCW is that he wanted to work with guys like Michaels and Bret Hart and put them over in the ring, whereas Vince wanted one of the most popular guys in the company to focus on commentary.
If that’s true, Vince was clearly losing the plot years ago, because if this was even a small taste of what Shawn and Randy could do together, then we missed out on some majorly impressive matches.
Of course, this was helped along a lot by Macho’s former queen, Sensational Sherri, who ran interference on her new boyfriend’s behalf throughout the entire thing and even put the boots in to Savage.
Making her final ever WWF appearance, Miss. Elizabeth also got involved, with all four participants helping build to an exciting finsih where Macho picked up the win thanks to a flying crossbody.
Your Winner and Still WWF Champion: Randy Savage
Post-match, the bad guys attacked, but Sherri inadvertently hurt her man and left him laying as Savage and Liz celebrated.
The Bushwhackers Shag Sheep
For the second time in a row, Gorilla Monsoon told us that we were going to Shawn Michaels. This time, Bobby actually corrected him and reminded him that it would be Sean Mooney we’d be hearing from next.
Mooney introduced The Bushwhackers who embraced what seemed like every single fan in the arena as they made their way to Mooney’s interview platform.
When Mooney asked the New Zealanders how they found England, they insisted that they didn’t find it at all, but rather a plane did.
The misunderstandings continued until the cousins finally admitted that they loved the UK, its people, and even the sheep, claiming that the only downside was that you had to get up real early in the morning to get the attractive sheep.
I could be wrong, but did The Bushwhackers just openly admit to being sheep shaggers?
The Talking is Over
Out in the back, Lord Alfred Hayes caught up with The Mountie and Jimmy Hart.
The promo started in fine fashion as the two nefarious heels both boasted about the UK somehow falling under Mountie’s jurisdiction.
Things took an awkward and uncomfortable turn, however, when Mountie decided to drop some casual racism, implying not only that all black men look alike, but that they were all lazy and only fit for shining shoes.
Offering a reply, Virgil gave an angry interview to Sean Mooney, insisting that there was nothing wrong with shining shoes as it was a hard day’s work for a hard day’s pay.
I can’t argue with that, though I do have to question Virgil’s sanity when he claimed that he was going to float like a butterfly and sting like a bee, just like…Frank Bruno.
Honestly, in the 30+ years that I’ve been watching wrestling, that’s the first Virgil promo I’ve ever seen and, judging by the quality of it, I’m not surprised that I haven’t seen many more.
The Mountie (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. Virgil
If you were watching this match in the hope of seeing some excellent in-ring action, you’d be sorely disappointed.
Indeed, this wasn’t a stellar match, but it was entertaining in its own ridiculously exaggerated sort of way as both men spent most of the time doing the kind of spots that were great for the live crowd but not as fun when watching on TV.
The end came when Mountie jabbed Virgil in the belly with his cattle prod to retain the title.
Your Winner: The Mountie
Out in the back, Sean Mooney interviewed The Model Rick Martel.
After expressing his disappointment at the lack of class and fashion sense, The Model cut a decent (if strangely out of breath) promo in which he promised to dethrone Bret Hart and become the best-dressed Intercontinental champion ever.
In response, The Hitman was all business as he promised to leave England still with his gold in tact.
World Wrestling Federation Intercontinental Championship WWF Intercontinental Champion Bret ‘The Hitman’ Hart vs. Rick ‘The Model’ Martel
I’m not sure if I’m alone in this, but I honestly expected more from this match.
Sure, this was two masters of their craft going at it, so it certainly didn’t suck and the action was pretty good, but they moved at such a slow pace that it really took the shine off what could have otherwise been a tremendous contest.
What was more disappointing was that, after being on the receiving end of Mattel’s offense for some time, Bret won the match with a quick small package from out of nowhere, cutting things short just when it was getting good.
Your Winner and Still Intercontinental Champion: Bret Hart
Backstage, Hacksaw Jim Dugan flushed the crapper and left the bathroom stall so that he could talk to Alfred Hayes about his upcoming battle of the titans with Repo Man.
He began by encouraging the UK fans to chant “USA” for him and then followed up with the best example I’ve ever seen of managing expectations as he told us that his upcoming bout wasn’t going to be a wrestling match with holds and takedowns but rather a good, old fashioned fight.
The Repo Man vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan
Duggan may have wanted the British fans to yell another country’s name, but at least he had the good sense not to bring his trusty US flag to ringside with him.
I’m sure that wouldn’t have gone down well.
Much as Hacksaw has promised, this wasn’t much of a wrestling match and was more about Duggan and Repo Man working the crowd in between bouts of clobberin’ on one another.
After a few minutes of uninteresting action, Repo walloped Hacksaw with his trusty grappling hook thingy and got himself disqualified.
Your Winner via DQ: Jim Duggan
Post-match, Repo Man choked out his opponent, Only for Big Jim to make the inevitable comeback and chase Repo off with his 2x4 to the delight of the audience.
Duggan then waited until his music had stopped to demand that it be turned off before leading the crowd in one last chant for a country thousands of miles away.
Macho Madness Running Wild, Yeah!
Once again, we went backstage to Sean Mooney, who was standing by with world wrestling federation champion Randy Savage and his lovely wife Elizabeth.
When he wasn’t losing his mind about he and Elizabeth having thousands of honeymoons in England, The Macho Man graciously put over both Shawn Michaels and The British Bulldog though he insisted that as good as both of those men were, he was really only interested in facing Ric Flair again.
The British Bulldog Way
Prior to our main event, Alfred Hayes talked to the UK’s own British Bulldog.
Declaring the European Ramage tour to have been a successful time for both himself, his brother-in-law Bret Hart, and for Macho Man, Davey Boy bigged up the UK fans and promised that his opponent, IRS was “going down, The British Bulldog way.”
Honestly, I've always been a huge fan of The Brtish Bulldog, but this was a horrible promo from the Wigan-born star.
WWF Tag Team Champion Irwin R. Schyster (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. The British Bulldog
Davey Boy was so over with his fellow countrymen that I bet he and IRS could have stood there for the whole match without so much as locking up and the fans would have still blown the roof off the place.
As it happens, they didn’t just stand there and they did lock up before giving us as entertaining a match as the two were capable of.
Though it obviously paled in comparison to the earlier Savage/Michaels bout, it was still a good effort that kept the crowd hot from start to finish and ended with a predictable (though no less satisfying) powerslam victory for The Bulldog.
Your Winner: The British Bulldog
As Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan signed off for the evening, Davey Boy scaled the ropes and celebrated his big win with a rapturous hometown crowd.
If you’re watching UK Rampage 1992 expecting to see a bunch of classic wrestling matches, you’re going to be disappointed.
Yes, Macho Man Randy Savage vs. Shawn Michaels was a great effort and worth tracking down, but other than that, there were not a lot of potential five-star classics on this card.
If you were a fan back in the early 90s, however, and you watch this show purely for nostalgia’s sake, then I’m going to assume you’ll enjoy it as much as I did.
After all, what it lacked in wrestling prowess, the show more than made up for with the larger-than-life characters and general sports entertainment craziness that made so many of us fans in the first place.
Regular Retro Pro Wrestling readers may have seen me mention in the past that my main motivation behind starting this blog was to review every single WWE PPV from Wrestlemania 1 to Wrestlemania 30.
Though I’ve since expanded that goal to include every WCW and ECW PPV too, I remain nonetheless committed to covering all of WWE’s “Premium Live Events” from the first three decades following the first ‘Mania.
Doing so means I occasionally have to go back and review stuff I’ve missed like the 1985 PPV, The Wrestling Classic.
Honestly, I’m not looking forward to it:
The World Wrestling Federation were not exactly known for producing a wealth of five-star bangers during the mid-1980s, and that’s before I mention the fact that this show features a 16-man tournament.
Every time I think of one-night tournaments I get flashbacks to the horrendous nightmare that was Wrestlemania IV and I can barely face it.
Still, face it I must, and I shall.
Besides, maybe The Wrestling Classic will be better than anticipated.
There’s only one way to find out, right?
Let’s get to it.
The World Wrestling Federation Presents Wrestlevision
Tonight’s show began with an introduction In which a Howard Finkle voice-over told us that the WWF presented Wrestlevision, without actually telling us what that was or what it meant.
Honestly, I’ve Googled this and I’m still none the wiser.
Perhaps it was an early name the company gave to their PPV specials or something.
Who knows?
If any of you do, please let me know in the comments below.
Anyway, Fink then proceeded to run down all the participants in the dreaded 16-man “Wrestling Classic Tournament” as well as telling us that we’d also hear who had won a Rolls-Royce the WWF were giving away and see Hulk Hogan defending the title against Rowdy Roddy Piper.
Fink then sent it down to Vince McMahon.
The boss welcomed us to The Rosemont Horizon before repeating what Howard had just told us.
Vince then introduced us to Lord Alfred Hayes and a lady whose name was apparently Susan Waitkis.
I thought she might be a celebrity I’ve never heard of, but another Google search reveals no information about her outside the context of his event.
The legendary Lord Alfred put over tonight’s tournament as the ultimate test of endurance, insisting that it was going to be more taxing than a decathlon and a marathon rolled into one.
The mysterious lady (are you out there, Susan? Who are you?) Then used a pointer to show us the tournament brackets for tonight as Vince McMahon named the competitors.
The Luck of the Draw
Vince then sent us to highlights from earlier in the day where Mean Gene Okerlund and two random dudes in suits presided over the tournament drawing.
Ricky Steamboat drew Davey Boy Smith’s name out of a bowl and that should be a good match.
Elsewhere, Elizabeth picked Macho Man Randy Savage’s opponent, and Mr. Fuji drew on behalf of The Magnificent Muraco.
A Word With The President
From there, Vince and Hayes sent us back to Mean Gene who this time was standing by with WWF President Jack Tunney and his massive chin.
Big Jack expressed his excitement for tonight’s event and told us that the WWF had “outdone themselves,” probably forgetting that he was supposed to be the head of the company and thus should have said “ourselves.”
The President then told us that the only rule for tonight was that you had to win your match to proceed which was both obvious and untrue.
Surely rules like don’t hit your opponent with a weapon and don’t stay outside of the ring for more than 10 seconds still applied?
With all that preamble out of the way, Vince then sent us to our announce team for the evening, the classic pairing of Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura.
Wow: we’re five and a half minutes into this and not only have we not heard the opening bell yet, but I feel like I’ve already been writing this review for an hour.
Still, I’m not complaining.
Although nothing up to this point was particularly entertaining, it was cool to see all these old-school stars, and it’s been so long since I reviewed a show featuring either Gorilla or Jesse that I’m genuinely excited to hear them again.
The duo were as excited to be there as I was to hear from them, and the two eventually helped us get the show on the road by sending to The Fink for the introductions to our opening match.
Adrian Adonis (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. Corporal Kirschner
As Gorilla Monsoon made reference to Adrian Adonis’ former tag team with Jesse Ventura, the big man from New York locked up with Corporal Kirschner in a very short match that was no different than the kind of thing you’d see on TV back in this era.
Though it was inoffensive, there was really nothing to make this one stand out, and Adonis picked up the win in about three minutes.
Your Winner: Adrian Adonis
After a quick recap, we went backstage where Mean Gene interviewed Adonis and his manager, Jimmy Hart.
The Mouth of the South called his man a superstar before Adrian cut a crazy promo about rewriting the wrestling rule book.
The promo was far more fun than anything Adonis had just done in the ring.
Dynamite Kid vs. Nikolai Volkoff
Back in the arena, both competitors were already in the ring.
Nikolai Volkoff busted out his usual rendition of the Soviet National Anthem while Dynamite Kid stood by patiently.
His patience wore out, however, when Volkoff finished his ditty and began berating the live crowd.
At that point, Dynamite scaled the top rope and let rip with a sweet drop kick, putting the evil Russian away in less than 10 seconds and eliciting two “holy mackerel!”s from Monsoon.
Your Winner: Dynamite Kid
Backstage, Okerlund interviewed Macho Man Randy Savage.
With Miss Elizabeth standing by, Macho Man claimed that despite feeling nervous, he was hyper and ready to go for his match with Ivan Putski.
Something tells me I’m going to enjoy the promos on this show far more than the matches.
Ivan Putski vs. Macho Man Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth)
Making his way out to the familiar sounds of Pomp and Circumstance, Macho Man entered into an entertaining performance against Putski.
This was another very short match, and it certainly wasn’t one for the ages or anything, but both men tried hard to make the best of what they’d been given and the crowds were into it.
A few short minutes of enjoyable action, Savage got the pin with his feet on the ropes.
Your Winner: Macho Man Randy Savage
Prior to the next match, the mysterious Susan updated the tournament brackets while McMahon and Hayes talked about them.
The duo were interrupted by an enraged Nikolai Volkoff, who ranted to the pair about being robbed in his earlier match.
Not-so-fun fact:
We’re still less than 25 minutes into this. Man, this review is going to take forever.
Ricky ‘The Dragon’ Steamboat vs. Davey Boy Smith
It’s a little weird to me that Dynamite Kid had earlier been billed as coming from Manchester but now Davey Boy Smith was supposedly from Leeds when both were in fact from a tiny town called Golborne in Wigan.
That aside, this was the best match on the show so far and could have been something special had the tournament not forces all the matches to remain short.
Just as the match was gathering some real momentum, Smith charged at Ricky Steamboat but crashed into the ring ropes in a move that didn’t look all that painful but was apparently enough to render the future Hall of Famer unable to continue.
Your Winner via Referee’s Decision: Ricky Steamboat
In a display of class and sportsmanship, The Dragon came to his fallen opponent’s aid after the match was over.
Backstage, Junkyard Dog mumbled his way through an awkward interview with Mean Gene in which he called his upcoming opponent The Iron Sheik a “Dubba Dubba Champion” and then said he wanted to congratulate Chicago.
For what, exactly, I have no idea.
Given Okerlund’s response, it seemed like JYD meant to congratulate one of the city’s sports teams for something specific but had forgotten the name of the team and what they’d achieved. As such, it came across as Dog was simply congratulating the city for existing.
That was an uncomfortable watch.
The Iron Sheik vs. The Junkyard Dog
This wasn’t a great match from a technical standpoint, but JYD was over like rover and The Iron Sheik was a tremendous villain, so it worked in terms of pure crowd-popping entertainment.
After a match that was weirdly allowed to go almost twice as long as the Steamboat/Smith match, JYD head butted the former Dubba Dubba Champion for the win.
Your Winner: Junkyard Dog
Backstage, Mean Gene interviewed Terry Funk and his manager, Jimmy Hart.
Ignoring Okerlund’s question about tonight’s tournament, The Funker first said that he wanted a shot at the WWF title and then in the same breath also said that he wanted Paul Orndorff which made it sound like he thought Mr. Wonderful was the champion.
Clearing things up, Funk explained that he was out to claim the bounty placed on Orndorff’s head by his (Orndorff’s) former manager, Bobby Heenan.
The plan, you see, was to use the bounty money to buy himself a title shot against the man he claimed would be the next world champion, Roddy Piper.
Finally, Hart promised a big surprise as Funk spat tobacco all over the camera lens.
That was crazy, but in a good way.
Moondog Spot vs. Terry Funk (w/ Jimmy Hart)
Prior to the bell, Terry Funk took to the microphone and claimed that he no more wanted to wrestle Moondog Spot than Spot wanted to wrestle him.
He then suggested both men leave the ring and call it a draw.
Moondog agreed and the two began heading up the entrance, only for Funk to reveal his plan and attack his opponent.
The plan backfired, however, when the two made it to the side of the ring where Funk actually threw Spot back into the ring and then immediately got counted out by Earl Hebner.
I can understand people being angry at that non-match, but honestly, it was so ridiculous that I found it absolutely hilarious.
Your Winner via Countout; Moondog Spot
Prior to the next contest, Mr Fuji claimed that Tito Santana had met his match in Magnificent Don Murraco, while Murraco himself insisted that he was glad to be getting in the ring with one of the best.
Non-Title Match WWF Intercontinental Champion Tito Santana vs. Magnificent Don Murraco (w/ Mr Fuji)
Like the Smith/Steamboat bout from earlier, this was shaping up to be a good match until the dumb finish.
Santana and Murraco worked well together, delivering an engaging contest until the former IC champion dove onto the current title-holder for the three count.
Apparently, however, Tito had his foot on the ropes. You wouldn’t have known this though because the cameraman completely missed it, so when Santana popped back up and caught his opponent off guard with a surprise roll-up that the official delivered a fast count for, it came off as very confusing.
Your Winner: Tito Santana
As Mr Fuji protested the decision, a small but audible “bullsh*t!” chant came from the crowd.
I don’t blame them either, that was such a heel move for a babyface to commit.
Out in the back, Bobby Heenan told Mean Gene that despite not having any men in tonight’s competition, he was here actively scouting for new talent.
Cowboy Bob Orton vs. Mr Wonderful Paul Orndorff
This was the longest and most enjoyable match on the card so far.
Though it may not stand up against the balls-to-the-wall bangers we see in the modern age, it was still very good for the time period and looked like Taker/Michaels from Wrestlemania compared to some of the absolute dross we’d seen on The Wrestling Classic so far.
After a very good battle, Bob Orton blasted Mr. Wonderful with his trademark cast and made the cover, but referee Earl Hebner had seen the whole thing and disqualified the Ace Cowboy.
Your Winner via DQ: Paul Orndorff
Next, cameras cut to Lord Alfred Hayes sexually molesting a visibly uncomfortable Susan Waitkis while Vince McMahon watched.
McMahon eventually prized Lord Alfred’s filthy hands off the distressed woman and asked him to tell us about what we’d seen in the first round.
Hayes only had two things to say about each match. Either it was great or a surprise, or in some cases a great surprise (yes, I know, that’s three things).
In a repeat of the last McMahon/Hayes segment, Terry Funk then burst onto the scene and complained about being robbed in his match before threatening to slap Alfred.
Whether the slap was because Terry was angry at his match or Lord Alfred was a blatant sex pest is something we may never know.
Quarter Final 1 Dynamite Kid vs. Adrian Adonis (w/ Jimmy Hart)
As Jesse Ventura abandoned the commentary table to apparently go and talk to The Macho Man, Dynamite and Adonis gave us a good match.
After the absolute dross of the first 45-50 minutes of this show, it was good to see the quality finally picking up from the Orndorff/Orton match onwards.
This wasn’t spectacular or anything, but it was certainly a solid effort that ended with a win for the British Bulldog member thanks to a flash pin.
Your Winner: Dynamite Kid
Post match, Adonis threw a temper tantrum.
Meanwhile, out in the back, Mean Gene accused Jesse Ventura of being a biased commentator.
The Body refuted such claims, but did declare that he’d been scouting on behalf of Randy Savage and had informed Macho of the best way to beat his upcoming opponent.
Quarter Final 2 Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat vs. Macho Man Randy Savage
A precursor to their legendary battle at Wrestlemania 3, this was a brilliant little match that proved that just because a bout only runs to two or three minutes, it doesn’t have to suck.
After a tremendous effort from both men, Savage pulled an international object from his trunks and used it to steal a victory from The Dragon.
Your Winner: Macho Man Randy Savage
Out in the back, Okerlund tried to interview Moondog Spot, but Spot could only grunt and beat himself in the head with a bone, so Gene cut it short and we went back to the ring.
Quarter Final 3 Moondog Spot vs. The Junkyard Dog
JYD came out to “Grab Them Cakes” from The Wrestling Album and then entered into a weird bit of nothing with Moondog Spot.
For reasons that were never explained, there was no official for this match, so Junkyard simply hit his opponent with a couple of headbutts, pinned him, and made his own three count before leaving the ring, calling it a day in bout 40 seconds.
“I don’t think that’s going to be official,” said Monsoon, but apparently it was.
Your Winner: The Junkyard Dog
In our second Bobby Heenan interview of the night, The Brain insisted that he wasn’t worried that nobody had claimed the $50,000 bounty on Mr. Wonderful’s head yet because his time would definitely come.
Heenan was also eager to see Roddy Piper best Hulk Hogan for the title.
Quarter Final 4 WWF Intercontinental Champion Tito Santana vs. Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff
This could have been a great match, but instead the two babyfaces decided to keep things clean and focus on holds.
Santana held Orndorff in a headlock for a bit, then transitioned to a head scissors before slapping on an Armbar.
Mr. Wonderful then recovered and worked on his opponent’s leg for a bit and nothing much happened.
It was rather boring until the finish when the two threw the babyface rule book out of the window and brawled on the outside until they were both counted out.
Double Countout
Elsewhere the arena, Lord Alfred Sexpest continued to grope and fondle Susan, who at least pretended to enjoy it more than she had the last time.
Alfred and Vince ran down the updated tournament brackets, which now gave Junkyard Dog a by into the final as a result of the previous match’s double Countout finish.
So yes, JYD got through to the final by virtue of winning a 30-second match in which he counted his own pinfall.
World Wrestling Federation Championship WWF Champion Hulk Hogan vs. Rowdy Roddy Piper
Piper came out first with a full entourage of bagpipe players, after which we cut backstage for a Hulk Hogan promo.
Having still not fully embraced the trademark red and yellow attire that he’d become synonymous with later in his career, The Hulkster cut claimed that Hot Rod had backed himself into a corner by running his mouth about being the next champion.
Cutting a charismatic figure, Hogan naturally insisted that he would topple his opponent before heading to the ring for a hot match with a lively crowd.
Though it was never going to be a technical masterpiece, the two were excellent at captivating an audience and played their roles well here, putting on a match that was a lot of fun to watch.
In the end, the referee got destroyed so Piper brought in a chair but Hogan snatched it and whacked Piper with it.
Roddy’s buddy Bob Orton then ran out, but by this time the official had risen from his nap and called for the disqualification.
Your Winner via DQ and Still WWF Champion: Hulk Hogan
Backstage, JYD gave another interview to Mean Gene.
This time, he spoke at 5,000 miles an hour but somehow still mumbled his way through it.
The funniest part was that Junkyard talked about how great it was to be in Chicago while looking absolutely miserable about being there.
Semi-Final Dynamite Kid vs. Macho Man Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth)
Dynamite and Savage took a few moments to click, but when they did, it was a thing of beauty.
Unable to get the better of his opponent in the early going, Savage took a breather on the outside but returned to deliver an excellent match that could have (perhaps should have) gone an extra ten minutes without any problems.
At the finish, Savage scaled the ropes, but Kid drop kicked him then took him down with an impressive superplex that was genuinely a major deal back in 1985.
As the crowd went crazy and Gorilla gushed over how they’d never seen such a move before, Dynamite got a roll-up but Savage reversed it and pinned his way into the final.
Your Winner: Macho Man Randy Savage
Giving Savage a break before the main event, we next went to Vince and Susan, the latter of whom looked relived to be away from Lord Alfred but still incredibly uncomfortable to be there.
The duo showed us a clip of the Rolls-Royce that was being given away in a sweepstake before sending it down to the ring to reveal the winner.
In order to do that, Howard Finkle first had to introduce us to WWF President Jack Tunney.
Tunney announced that they’d received thousands upon thousands of entries to the sweepstakes and thanked the fans for their response.
Next, Fink introduced us to WWF promotions manager Basil DeVito who also told us that they’d had lots of entries to the competition but added nothing else.
Then, as it this wasn’t long enough, Fink introduced us to some dude from the marketing company that managed the contest.
You know what he said?
Yep, that they’d had lots of entries.
By this point, the restless crowd were loudly booing, and even though Marketing Dude’s comments were unnecessary, I couldn’t help feel bad for him as nerves were clearly starting to get the better of him.
Finally, Lord Alfred Hayes also told us about how many entries they’d received before revealing that some dude called Mark Hanley (Mark Hamley?) from Illinois had won.
The crowd booed poor Mark like he was the biggest heel in the building, and when Lord Sexpest asked them to cheer for him, they booed even louder which for some reason made Big Bad Al’ laugh his ass off.
As Alfred was talking, you could clearly hear Gorilla Monsoon taking to somebody on the headset, and it was to him and Jesse that we went next.
Monsoon found the fact that Michael had won the Roller to be quite humorous and chuckled about it before sending it backstage to Mean Gene.
Hanging in the locker room, Okerlund interviewed Hogan, who was eventually joined by Paul Orndorff.
The champ insisted that he and Mr. Wonderful watched each other’s backs and claimed that they’d be ready any time
piper and Orton wanted to face them in a match.
Tournament Final Macho Man Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth) vs. Junkyard Dog
Savage hobbled to the ring looking tired and hurt after wrestling three hard-fought contests while JYD sauntered out looking fresh as a daisy after wrestling for 40 seconds in the past hour and a half and getting a bye into the final.
There’s nothing wrong with doing the weary warrior vs. The fresh-faced opponent, but isn’t it usually the face who comes out battle-worn and ready to overcome the odds?
Anyway, this was a fine main event that was given enough time and was legitimately enjoyable until JYD tossed Savage to the outside and won by Countout.
Again, shouldn’t it be the heel doing this?
Your Winner: Junkyard Dog
Post-match, Mean Gene tried to interview the Wrestling Classic tournament winner but they were interrupted by Jesse The Body.
Ventura protested that Savage had wrestled three times while Junkyard Dog had an easy night.
He had a point too, I was honestly rooting for Macho Man because Junkyard seemed like such an unworthy winner.
Deciding not to finish his promo after Jesse pointed out how hollow his victory was, a folorn-looking JYD simply chatted off-mic to Mean Gene before Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura signed off and the credits rolled.
So, was The Wrestling Classic tournament better than the never-ending nightmare that was Wrestlemania 4?
Well, yes and no.
On the one hand, there was some genuinely enjoyable wrestling here.
Savage/Dynamite was the best thing on the card while Orndorff/Orton delivered and Steamboat/Savage was also a gem.
On the other hand, I think we had like 3 clean finishes in the whole tournament and a lot of dumb booking, especially when it came to Junkyard Dog.
The guy had one three minute match against Iron Sheik, wrestled (and I use that term very loosely here) for about 40 seconds against Moondog Spot and didn’t even get a three-count from a verified official, and then sat around for an hour enjoying a bye to the final.
Then, he took on a Macho Man who had been working his ass of all night and could only beat him by Countout.
All this, and we’re supposed to think JYD has truly earned his tournament win?
It was incredibly stupid, but a good bit of nostalgia with a smattering of good wrestling to boot.
As regular Retro Pro Wrestleing readers may recall, last week's review featured WCW Greed, the final ever World Championship Wrestling Pay Per View.
That means we've now covered every single WCW PPV from January 1996 up until the company's demise, and what better way to celebrate that fact than by looking back on the top ten best matches from that time period?
Before we get into it, here's the criteria:
There isn't one.
The only criteria for choosing these matches is how much I enjoyed them. It doesn't matter if other matches were better from a workrate perspective or anything like that. If I had a good time watching it, it goes in.
On a similar note, these top ten WCW PPV matches aren't necessarily in exact order. Other than the number-one ranked match which remains one of my all-time favourites, there's no reason why any of the other matches are ranked where they are.
If you want to argue that my ninth pick is actually better than the match at number four, you're probably right.
Anyway, without further ado, let's dive into it.
10. Triple Ladder Match - 3 count vs. Jung Dragons vs. Noble & Karagious - Starrcade 2000
The last 18 months of WCW's existence was hardly known for producing quality entertainment. Now ould you ever consider the likes of 3 Count and The Jung Dragons to be among the company's most illustrious stars.
Still, there's no doubting that this high-octane spotfest from Starrcade 2000 was a lot of fun.
That said, so were most of the matches between these six men.
For what felt like the majority of the year, WCW would book The Jung Dragons and 3 Count against each other. When that got boring, they broke Evan Karagias away from the latter and Jamie Noble away from the former and had them establish a new tag team so that we could have lots and lots (and lots) of different six-man and three-way matches.
Though they'll never go down as all-time classics, they were insanely good fun and always a highlight of any show they happened to be on.
9. Blitzkrieg vs. Juventud Guerrera - Spring Stampede 1999
There's no denying the fact that 1999 was clearly the worst year in World Championship Wrestling's history, at least from a creative standpoint. Watching all 12 of their 1999 PPVs as I did for this blog was a tedious, frustrating, and sometimes downright infuriating process.
Yet in the midst of all their horribleness, the company somehow managed to pull a rather excellent Pay Per View out of their ass in the form of Spring Stampede 1999. The show featured several excellent contests, including a Raven's Rules tag team match pitting Raven and Saturn against Chris Benoit and Dean Malenko, a thoroughly entertaining hardcore match between Hak (Sandman) and Bam Bam Bigelow, and a gripping cruiserweight title match which pitted tag team champions Billy Kidman and Rey Mysterio (also the cruiserweight champion) against one another.
Heck, even the main event -in which DDP won his first World Heavyweight Championship- was good stuff.
To be fair, a case could be made for any one of those matches to feature somewhere on this list, but for some reason, this compelling match between Juventud Guerrera and oft-forgotten cruiserweight star Blitzkrieg has always stood out to me as an absolute gem.
Remember, this isn't meant to be the definitive list of great PPV matches according to some strict scientific criteria. It's one dude's opinion, and this dude says that Blitzkrieg/Juvi is a favorite.
8. Steven Regal vs. Dave 'Fit' Finlay - Uncensored 96
Making their way from Blackpool and Belfast respectively, Regal and Finlay set out to show the American audiences how things were done in the UK and Ireland with a stiff, hard-hitting contest that was violently entertaining from start to finish.
OK, so the crowd at WCW Uncensored 1996 didn't seem to care much for it at the time, but if you ask me, few things are as fun as watching two talented wrestlers just beat the living crap out of each other as these two did here.
7. Falls Count Anywhere match: Chris Benoit vs. Kevin Sullivan - Great American Bash 1996
For obvious reasons, I try not to draw too much attention to Chris Benoit on RPW, but to leave out this fantastic Falls Count Anywhere match from The 1996 Great American Bash would be to deny Kevin Sullivan his rightful place on this list.
Of course, the old joke is that Kevin Sullivan booked his own divorce during his feud with Benoit, but there was no joking around when the two beat the hell out of each other all the way to the men's bathroom and back again.
This wasn't the only match from that year's Great American Bash to make it onto this list, and the one we'll get to later was (arguably) better, but man, what a heck of a fight this was.
6. Ladder Match: Syxx vs. Eddie Guerrero - Souled Out 97
Let's be honest - there wasn't a lot to like about WCW's ill-advised nWo Souled Out PPV in 1997. An attempt at running an nWo-only PPV, the show was mostly a creative and financial disaster.
So sure, with so much bad stuff surrounding it, the Eddie Guerrero/Syxx ladder match was always going to look good, but even taken out of context, this was still an excellent contest.
Of course, it could have done without the heel commentary referring to Eddie as a "Mexican jumping bean,' but that's another argument for another day.
5. Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T - Bash at the Beach 2000
Even when WCW was at its peak in terms of popularity and creative excellence, the company's PPV main events were normally huge disappointments in which Hulk Hogan and a bunch of other dundering old-timers wandered around the ring doing as little as possible.
Then, at Bash of the Beach 2000, Hulk Hogan 'dropped' the title to Jeff Jarrett in an infamous angle in which he merely laid down and handed JJ the win. The show as a whole is remembered more for this -and Vince Russo's subsequent worked-shoot/shoot- promo than it is for anything that actually happened in the ring, but that's not to take anything away from the tremendous effort Jarrett and Booker T would have in the actual main event.
Proving that WCW could deliver exciting action at the top of the card, this was as good as it got at the time and still holds up today as a quality match.
4. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Dean Malenko - Great American Bash 1996
Told you Benoit/Sullivan wasn't the only match from Great American Bash '96 to feature on this list. Truthfully, this whole list could have been made up of matches featuring Dean Malenko and Rey Mysterio and you'd have a hard time arguing that it wasn't a reflection of the best matches ever - but I wanted to add some variety.
Yet while I may have left out some of their matches to make room for some of WCW's other talented stars, it would be a crime against all that is good and decent to leave out this absolute five-star worthy cruiserweight classic.
3. DDP vs. Goldberg - Halloween Havoc 98
The story surrounding this match may be more famous than the match itself. In his 2018 Hall of Fame speech, Goldberg recalled how Diamond Dallas Page had the whole thing meticulously planned out, even presenting him with a 15-page script to follow.
WCW being WCW, however, the show ran long and the PPV cut off before most people could see the match. Fortunately, we got to see it for free on Nitro the following day (and on the Network years later) and it was tremendous.
Clearly, DDP's meticulous planning paid off as this Halloween Havoc 1998 match was one of his best, and I've yet to see Goldberg involved in anything better.
This match from Spring Stampede 1997 was the highlight of an incredible feud that still stands up today as being worthy of its place on this list.
1. Cruiserweight Title vs. Mask Match: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Eddie - Halloween Havoc 97
Ask me to name my favourite matches of all time, and off the top of my head, I'll tell you that my top two are the HHH/Rock ladder match from Summerslam 1998 and this all-time classic between two true legends from Halloween Havoc 1997.
Incredible from start to finish, Eddie Guerrero was at the peak of his WCW heel run here, and was an excellent antagonist for the ever-popular Rey Mysterio Jr. Take that good old fashioned good versus evil story and combine it with the outstanding talent of two men like Mysterio and Guerrero, and what you had here was not just one of the best WCW PPV matches, but one of the best matches of all time, period.
New reviews of classic WWF/WWE events recalling every moment from Wrestlemania 1 - 30. You'll also find reviews of WCW, ECW, TNA and the occasional indie event, along with a look at old school magazines, merchandise and more.