EVENT REVIEW: WCW Clash of the Champions X - Texas Shoot Out

WCW Clash of the Champions X - Texas Shoot Out
February 6, 1990
Memorial Coliseum, Corpus Christi, Texas

Long time Retro Pro Wrestling readers will probably be aware that we haven’t exactly gone about writing WCW reviews in any kind of logical fashion.

After throwing in a random 1992 review written years before this blog existed, the regular WCW coverage started with the 1996 PPVs because I had an urge to relive the formation of the New World Order.

It was only after I then worked all the way through to WCW Greed that I then went back and started from the beginning with NWA Starrcade 1983.

The same goes for Clash of the Champions. I reviewed the first Clash of the Champions (featuring a good Sting vs. Ric Flair match) ages ago and haven’t bothered with the series since.

Today that changes.

From now on, we’ll cover the first five years of 1990s WCW in chronological order, following the storylines between Clash shows and PPVs.

At some point when I’m in the mood, we‘ll go back and look at the 1988 - 1989 Clash shows,  but for now, let’s dive into Clash of the Champions 10: Texas Shoot Out






Welcome to the Shoot Out Saloon 

WCW Clash of the Champions X - Jim Cornette and Jim Ross
We started tonight’s event with the kind of opening video that could only have come from the early 90s.

It took the form of a Western-themed video game in which pictures of various wrestlers would pop up in and around buildings with names like ‘The Shoot Out Saloon.’

As soon as the pictures popped up, the wrestlers would promptly get shot in the head and fall down.

It was weird, wonderful, hilarious and terrible all at the same time.

Live in the arena, Jim Ross welcomed us to the Texas Shoot Out before introducing us to his broadcast colleague, the one and only James E. Cornette.

Ross then proceeded to run down tonight’s card, but he was talking so quickly that it was impossible to follow anything that he was saying.

Fortunately, Cornette spoke a little more slowly as he shilled the opportunity to talk to Sting on the WCW hotline later that evening.

What a Rush!

WCW Clash of the Champions X - The Road Warriors faced The Skyscrapers
From there, Ross and Cornette sent us down to ringside where a tuxedo-clad Terry Funk told us that he was now called ‘Tuxedo Terry.’

Funk said nothing of note here. His job seemed mainly to shout out various wild-west themed phrases to hype up the crowd. It was entertaining, sure, but probably unnecessary.

I’m also going to assume that Funk was injured or just didn’t want to wrestle here because only WCW would book a Texas-themed show and have proud Texan Terry Funk reduced to a bit-part commentator.

Anyway, once Funk had finished shouting about nothing, he sent it to the back where the much-more subdued Gordon Sollie interviewed The Road Warriors.

The two gave us their typical shouty promo in which they promised to capture the tag team titles.

Although I could be wrong (especially after skipping two years of Clash shows), this was the first event I ever recalling hearing Hawk utter his famous ‘What a rush!’ line. 

The Samoan Savage (w/ Sir Oliver Humperdink) vs. Dr. Death Steve Williams 

WCW Clash of the Champions X - The Samoan Savage faced Dr. Death
The Samoan Savage
vs. Dr. Death - doesn’t it just sound like one of those made up matches you’d see featured when a sitcom needs to feature pro wrestling as part of its storyline?

Fortunately, WCW made sure that you didn’t have to watch a sitcom if you wanted a good wrestling-related laugh. They provided their own in the form of a pre-match vignette entitled ‘Dr. Death: Prescription for Punishment’ which may just be the greatest thing you’ve ever seen in your life.

It featured Dr. Death as an actual doctor, or rather a paramedic who burst out of an ambulance wearing his wrestling trunks and some kind of vaguely medical-looking shirt.

After yelling about rescuing somebody, the good doctor stormed off and stormed back carrying some random dude on his shoulders. After throwing the unfortunately unconscious randomer into the back of the ambulance, Williams proceeded to give him the worst CPR you’ve ever seen.

When that unsurprisingly failed to revive the hapless soul, Williams yelled ‘ QUICK! TO THE HOSPITAL!’ and the ambulance drove off with Dr. Death hilariously pressing his face against the glass window.

It was just so bizarre.

Were we to believe that Dr. Death was an actual doctor now? 

If so, why was he doing the job of a paramedic?

More importantly, what medical service in the world would allow their staff to run around in their underpants?

More importantly than even that, why would any patient in the world want to be treated by a man named Dr. Death who -if the title of this thing was to be believed- could only prescribe punishment?

I spent so much time pondering all these questions that I paid hardly any attention to the match which, to be fair, wasn’t all that interesting anyway.

The most interesting thing to happen was that Woman came down to ringside, took a seat, and looked absolutely beautiful.

In the end, Williams beat The Samoan Savage with a backslide.

Thank goodness it wasn’t something more serious so that he didn’t have to try and revive him with more crappy CPR.
Your Winner: Dr. Death

The hilarity continued next with a video promoting Wrestle War ‘90: Wild Thing.

I almost called it a rap video before I realized that would be insulting to the rap genre. What it was, was clips of various wrestlers set to an 8-bit beat while a guy would spit out fierce rhymes like:

‘The Steiners,
They’re brothers,
They wrestle as one...
...but they do not scare
The brothers Ander-son”

I’ve a feeling that when I wrap up this review later in going to recommend watching not for any of the actual matches but simply for all these insane videos.

Sting is Out of the Horsemen

WCW Clash of the Champions X - Ole Anderson kicked Sting out of the Four Horsemen
After teaming with Ric Flair in the main event of Halloween Havoc ‘89 and then seemingly earning his respect by beating him in a singles match at Starrcade ‘89, Sting had officially been a member of The Four Horsemen for all of about six weeks.

Tonight, he came to the ring with the Nature Boy and The Brothers Ander-Son. Ostensibly, they were out for an interview with their former rival Terry Funk, but it turned out it was all a rouse so that Ole Anderson could kick Sting out of the group for having the audacity to challenge Flair for the title at Wrestle War. 

To the surprise of nobody, this led to the Horsemen turning heel again by doing a number on Sting.

The Mod Squad (Spike & Basher) vs. Flyin’ Brian Pillman & The Z-Man

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  The Mod Squad
Just when you thought you’d heard of all the wrestlers who could have possibly mattered, along come The Mod Squad to prove that there’s always going to be a couple of guys who fly under your radar.

To give them credit, Spike and Basher looked to be a competent tag team who performed well as they took the fight to Flyin’ Brian and The Z-Man, but it was pretty clear from their unremarkable appearance and lack of fanfare that their only job was to get the babyfaces over.

To be fair, they did their job well. 

This was an enjoyable (if forgettable) little tag team match with a predictable win for the good guys.
Your Winners: Flyin’ Brian and The Z-Man

Moving on quickly...

Cactus Jack Manson vs. Mil Mascaras

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Cactus Jack Manson faced Mil Mascaras
Our old friend GMC referred to Cactus as Captain Jack Manson, which is probably why Cactus later chased after him and then ended up tripping backwards over a chair in a funny spot.

The actual match was good but, much like the Mod Squad earlier, it was fairly apparent that Manson was there mainly to make  Mil Mascaras look good.

He did that pretty well, counting the Mexican legend’s abundance of headscissor take downs with some wild brawling in a short but entertaining match.

Update: It was only after I finished this review that I was reminded that Foley had spoken about this match in his first book, where he discussed how awful and egotistical Mascaras was, leading to Mick doing his big "flying off the apron" spot to ensure he came away from the match more over than the luchadore legend.

Anyway...



After a few enjoyable minutes, Mascaras kicked his opponent off the apron onto the concrete floor then finished him up with a sweet flying splash for the cover, the count, and the fall.
Your Winner: Mil Mascaras

Returning from a commercial break, Cactus staggered into the crowd and headed towards 'The Tough Guys' - a band who had been playing during the ads. 

For seemingly no reason, the future WWF Champion targetted drummer 'Wilde Wolfe' (JT Southern), who for some reason was wearing the exact outfit that Brutus Beefcake is wearing in his Wikipedia page picture.

The two started brawling until cameras cut to the back, where the ever-gorgeous Missy Hyatt insisted that we tune in to see her co-hosting a show with Jim Ross.

Norman Wants Hot Dogs

Elsewhere, Gordon Sollie had to explain to Norman The Lunatic that the Falls Count Anywhere stipulation added to his match with Kevin Sullivan meant anywhere in the arena, not just in the ring.

Clutching a teddy bear and beaming from ear to ear, the big man got very excited about the prospect of taking Sullivan up to the hot dog stand and grabbing a few hot dogs after pinning his arch-nemesis.

Falls Count Anywhere
Kevin Sullivan vs. Norman The Lunatic

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Norman vs. Kevin Sullivan - Falls Count Anywhere
Before Norman made his entrance, we got a vignette of him visiting a petting zoo and talking to a pig as though it were Kevin Sullivan.

Seriously. WTF was I watching here?

Falls counted anywhere in the building, so of course, the two spent 90% of the match brawling in and around the ring before finally making their way backstage for the oh-so-wacky finish.

Sullivan hid in the women's bathroom, which was a big no-no for Norman. The big friendly lunatic at first refused to go in, but when the last remaining lady ran out of there, he stormed in and closed the door behind him.

Cue lots of crashing and banging before Sullivan stepped out of the door and collapsed on the floor, followed by Norman, with Nick Patrick raising his hand in victory.

Although it was a silly finish, most of the actual brawling up to that point was a lot of fun.
Your Winner: Norman the Lunatic 

After the break, we got a live “Funk’s Grill” with The Total Package Lex Luger.

It was very confusing.

Funk had been a babyface back at Starrcade ‘89, had come across as a babyface in the earlier Sting/Horsemen bit, and even started this segment with a babyface-like apology for the heinous beat down of Sting at the hands of Flair and Anderson.

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Terry Funk interviews Lex Luger
Then, from out of nowhere and for seemingly no reason whatsoever, Funk turned on the crowd and started calling them morons.

After ripping on the WCW roster for not having the guts to help him fight off the Horsemen, Funk turned his attention to a man he claimed would help him, but apparently didn’t.

That man was Lex Luger, who spent the majority of his promo time talking about Sting before finally deciding to list off his “allocades” (he meant accolades, presumedly).

Before Luger could get very far with putting himself over, however, Funk snatched the microphone from him and inexplicably began yelling “BUT I’M A COMMENTATOR! I’M A COMMENTATOR!” as if replying to an unreasonable request from Luger that The Total Package hadn’t actually made.

The US Champion then began to talk about his upcoming title defence, but Funk clearly got word in his ear that the segment had to be wrapped up, and that was pretty much that.

This isn’t the first time I’ve said this in this review, but WTF did I just watch? 

The New Skyscrapers (Dangerous Dan Spivey & Mean Mark Callous w/ Theodore Long) The Road Warriors (Hawk & Animal w/ Precious Paul Ellering)

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Teddy Long led The Skyscrapers into battle
Sid was out injured, so Theodore Long had replaced him with some gangly ginger fella called Mean Mark.

Prior to the bell, we got promos from both teams. Teddy Long put over his men as the most dominant tag team in pro wrestling before we got a video package of Hawk and Animal randomly destroying some cars with sledgehammers and a pneumatic drill to prove how tough they were.

Hawk then promised that he and Animal then promised to topple The Skyscrapers and that's pretty much what they did in this rather non-descript big man match.

After a few minutes of passable action, The Road Warriors hit a Doomsday Device but then the referee seemed to vanish in thin air so The Skyscrapers beat them down for the no-contest.
No Contest

After a quick commercial break, it was onto the next match.

Mask vs. Title Match
NWA World Tag Team Champions The Steiner Brothers (Rick Steiner & Scott Steiner) vs. Doom (Butch Reed & Ron Simmons)

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Doomed faced The Steiners in a Mask vs. Title match
Before the bell, we got more pre-recorded comments from both teams. Butch Reed cut a terrible promo for Doom in which he promised they would drop a bomb on The Steiners while Scott Steiner literally said nothing more than “Doom! Get Ready!

The actual match was decent enough, with a hot crowd and some good but not great action.

Towards the finish, Rick Steiner ripped Reed’s mask off, put it over his own head and then made the pin.
Your Winners and still tag team champions: The Steiner Brothers 

Afterwards, Ron Simmons made a big deal about finally taking his mask off.

The Horsemen Ride 

Before our main event, we got a backstage interview in which Ric Flair and The Andersons talked to Gordon Sollie.

Naturally, they said nothing about their upcoming match other than Flair off-handedly mentioning that they had one.

Instead, the whole focus was on The Horsemen’s issues with Sting.

It was compelling stuff, sure, but it would have been nice for them to acknowledge their upcoming match.

Cage Match
J-Tex Corporation (Buzz Sawyer, The Dragonmaster, and The Great Muta) vs. The Four Horsemen (NWA World Heavyweight Champion Ric Flair, Ole Anderson, and Arn Anderson)

WCW Clash of the Champions X -  Ric Flair and The Four Horsemen
The crowds hated The Horsemen for turning on Sting, which made Buzz Sawyer, The Great Muta, and The Dragonmaster the default babyfaces.

Not that the crowds were actually rooting for them or anything.

They spent the entire match chanting for Sting and when the popular fan favourite did show up, they went crazy.

Before Sting could get his hands on Flair, he was pulled away by a referee, Wahoo McDaniel, Tom Zenk, and Brian Pillman.

He later tried again, this time landing awkwardly as he jumped down from the cage and limping away with an injury that would take him out for months.

The actual match was nothing. It served no purpose other than to build tension between Sting and Flair.

It mattered so little that at one point, Buzz Sawyer hit a flying leap off the top of the cage (a move that wasn’t so commonplace in those days) and the crowd didn’t bat an eyelid.

Then, Ole Anderson pinned Sawyer but the crowds didn’t break from their ‘We Want Sting!’ chant to even acknowledge that the match was over.

Honestly, I think all six men could have sat in the ring on their asses playing cards in the nude and the audience wouldn’t have noticed.
Your Winners: The Four Horsemen 

Afterwards, Flair charged after an injured Sting and the two brawled as the credits rolled.









If you’re looking for exciting pro wrestling action, don’t come anywhere near this show.

Ok, some of the matches weren’t awful, but there was nothing that you’d class as ‘must see’ and the main event may as well have not happened at all.

If you’re looking for one of the most hilarious, confusing, cheesy, and baffling shows of all time, then Clash of the Champions 10 is for you.

From Dr. Death’s ambulance skit to Terry Funk’s inexplicable heel turn and the all kinds of insanity in between, this was one of those “so bad it’s good” shows that was ridiculously entertaining for all the wrong reasons.



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2 Comments

  1. How did you know what Brutus Beefcake was wearing on his Wikipedia page? lol You just randomly searching for Brutus?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ha! I searched for him before now for something relating to this blog and just randomly remembered that picture :D

    ReplyDelete